Remember how I have never been a smoker? That should help you keep track of how long they have had a voice simulator for me. With all of the audio files I have had online for years, they could have built the voice simulator for me as early as 2007.
I am peaceful, nonviolent, and completely benevolent. Everything to the contrary is lies. (I have sadly not had control of my own phone for years.) Please remember to point out and name slanderers publicly.
I have a sneaky suspicion, and I might be wrong about this one, that most lies about me are created and propagated by Homeland Security. Talk about a part of the executive branch that is completely redundant!
Do you remember when domestic terror concerns were handled by the FBI, and international ones were in the domain of the CIA? For what exactly does Homeland Security exist? TSA should be under the FBI or the FAA. How much taxpayer money could be saved if we did away with the redundancy that is Homeland Security completely? Fire Homeland Security and move its competent employees to the FBI.
And the division of Homeland Security called CyberSecurity, are they the ones who are patrolling my internet usage to make sure I cannot see the truth? Do they even have a real job? Protecting the nation's computers with cryptology is the job of the NSA. What is the real reason any division of Homeland Security exists?
Speaking of abuses of executive branch powers, the president would not have the ability to move troops without Congressional approval if Congress would vote to repeal the War Powers Act. Obama the Oppressor is really overstepping his job description. It is time to take that ability away from him.
That said, if Democrats want to retain any of the offices they have now, or even (Dare I say it?) possibly gain more influence over the government in the next election, they need to cut themselves free from Obama the Oppressor. The best thing to do would be to refuse to allow President Incompetent to run as an incumbent in 2012. Democrats, do not allow this chance to save yourselves pass you by. Cut loose your biggest liability and stop supporting your human-rights-violator president. You really can save yourselves. You just need to divorce yourselves from Obama the Asshole.
Are you, all of my people out there in my beautiful world, expressing yourselves fully to each other? Do not forget to print this out, attach angry letters, and mail this to all of your least favorite corrupt government officials and offices.
We can end this mess, but to do that people need to be out expressing themselves.
Do not forget the rules to maintaining freedom of speech...
1.) Do not lie about anyone.
2.) Do not plagiarize.
3.) Do not metaphorically scream "Fire!" in a crowded theater.
and
4.) Respect everyone's privacy.
Also, do not allow people who break these rules to pollute the world with their manure. They ruin the joy that is human expression for everyone. And everything that follows these rules is fair game for human expression.
Sweetness, do you need any back up out there? I know how hard you fight. Does your computer have a microphone in it? I know your phone does. You could always try what I do and talk to your computer when you hit a snag and need help. You never know what kind of benevolent help might be listening.
As for you, my hacker heroes, do I get to ask you for help, still? Do you mind not only keeping a watchful and helpful eye on my husband for me but also doing something to help stop the government from spying on us through our computers? The government constantly violates my privacy, infringes on my copyrights, and treats me without any human dignity or respect. I am really fed up with the government disregarding my human rights.
This is time for all of us to push together to end Obama the Oppressor's human rights violations. This is time for all of us together to end the persecution of me and the oppression of America. Thank you for all of your help in the past. I know I invoked the code of the Jedi on you once to make you stop doing something you were doing, but it was so brazen I was worried you were going to get yourselves caught. Do I get to ask you all for this further favor? Please say "Yes."
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