Preface: Same as always... Make sure you favorite or bookmark frisco-squid.blogspot.com, so you can check this blog regularly for new posts. Please read and share them all. Yes, yes, share all my blog posts yourselves!
Here is my latest blog post. I hear we have made great progress out there. When these things happen, Obama has a tendency to throw tantrums. Please keep a watchful eye over me, Sweetness, Syniva, etc. and be very helpful to my rescuers. Obama's tantrums are violent and ugly. We need to be on guard for his wrathful rages.
Turkey. Erdogan, you know I am no enemy of yours. In so many ways, you have been dealing with Syria and Syrian refugees alone and with very little help. I am a supporter of yours on the Syrian border, and I have great faith in you.
But is there any way to just build the shopping mall somewhere else? You will not lose any commerce, but you will be able to keep a rare green space for your people. Nature is very important. This world needs more trees and plants. Please consider it.
USA. It is already June, and this is still the latest news I can get about the immigration reform bill. This bill is particularly important to me not just because it includes immigration reform. It also has legislation designed to end the bubble of evil bundled within it.
Please, my beautiful America, stay on the ball with the immigration reform bill. Keep speaking with your Senators and Representatives to make sure it hits the floor for a vote and to make sure it passes. Because it includes immigration reform, Obama will have no choice but to sign it into law.
Try to find the immigration reform bill here, so you can discuss it with your Congresspeople. Congress knows what it is doing. It just needs a little oomph from the public.
As for the minutia of my life, the people who have pinhole cameras all over my apartment and who watch me in the privacy of my own home using the bathroom, taking a shower, and changing my clothes are the same people who pump voices into Sampo. That is how I know it is the federal government. Incidentally, it is also the same people who control the speakers in everyone's heads and who create so much libel of me.
I put on quite a light show Wednesday night, and according to Sampo, they got really nervous about all of the sparkly balls of energy and light. Sampo was giggly about their fearing the wrath of a superhuman god from me. Sigh, I am not wrathful. And I am not a god. I am a human, and I deserve human rights because of this.
I was supposed to be tortured Thursday, but fearing my legal genius, I think they gave me saline instead of heavy chemicals. That is, there is no lump on my arm, no scarring, and no bruising, and no brain cloud descended on me. It has been five hours, and I have not yet been reduced to weeping and rocking myself on the floor of my closet like usual. I am going to wait a couple of weeks then mail in my hair to see if I can get this confirmed. It is a welcome development.
In the land of evil Iowans, my current adult guardian is named Lynn Boeset. Her phone number is 515-382-3733, and she lives and works in a town in Iowa called Nevada. Feel free to Google "Lynn Boeset Nevada, IA", so you can track her down. Sue her, SynSyn. Give her hell until she relents. We need her broken and begging for mercy.
As an adult guardian, which is completely unnecessary since I am obviously not mentally incompetent to do anything, it is the evil Lynn Boeset's job to only do things concerning me that are in my best interest. But instead of doing anything in my best interest, the evil Obama stooge has joined the conspiracy of corruption that is trapping me in Iowa penniless and against my will.
If she were to do anything in my best interest, she would surrender control of my finances to me, so I could finally leave Iowa that tortures and persecutes me. I need to heal. I need a support system. I need my BFF. I need my husband. I need bodyguards. And Lynn Boeset is in the way of my health, prosperousness, and physical safety.
Yes, my beautiful world, we have made progress, but it has not been enough to render me safe. My beautiful world, hunt down Lynn Boeset, and command her to surrender her adult guardianship back to me. We have no wiggle room with this. We need my adult guardianship surrendered back to my control, so I can leave Iowa before Iowa kills or destroys me under the same orders from Obama that the evil Lynn Boeset obeys.
My beautiful world, yes, I still need you. I need you to get the immigration reform bill passed, and I need you to convince the evil Lynn Boeset to give me back my adult guardianship. Thank you for always taking such good care of me, and when in doubt, there are always these five easy things you can do, too.
1.) Organize. Make noise. Your constant pressure on the government is invaluable. See what you can do about organizing the entire public to save itself by disobeying the rules en masse. Obama terrorizes people into obeying him because they are good to me one by one. If everyone saves us all at once, America will get away with setting itself free. This is not rebellion; this is civil disobedience, that which civil rights movements are always built on. The rules are unconstitutional anyway.
2.) Increase awareness. Make sure there is no one anywhere in the world who does not know who I am, what I do for this world, and how much I suffer. I spend all day every day using my intellect to save the world. I have never been a stripper. That is just enduring slavery and libel.
3.) Turn in your evidence. If you have witnessed, endured, or suffered through any oppression or human rights violations at the hands of Obama, send Syniva your evidence and witness testimonies. We need your help, too. Do not just suffer. Set yourself free.
4.) Be good to me. Keep me as safe as possible. I live with a target the president of the United States put on my head. I could use some help making it through this without being so persecuted that I am destroyed. Be a hero; do not be a stereotypical Iowan.
5.) Get my rescuers to my side. Do whatever it takes. Take down everyone from DC to Des Moines who is in the way if necessary. Provide everything my rescuers ask for. Try to predict when and if they will need help. Even heroes need help. You know what to do. They need your help constantly.
And, thank you, my beautiful world. Thank you! We must take Obama down to save me, to save America, and to save the world.
My brave rescuers, ARE YOU OKAY??? Last I heard, Obama was still throwing the hugest tantrum yet, and you were suffering greatly because of it. I feel like I have been trying to send you help all day. Did help ever reach you? Please take care out there. I hate when you get hurt. I hate when you suffer. And I hate when you die.
SynSyn, I hear you have been heroing for me out there. Is everything you are touching turning to heroism? You have made grand progress, and I do not know where to begin thanking you.
Yes, thank you, SynSyn. From what I can tell from the size of Obama's tantrum today, we must really have him on the ropes. I cannot wait to hug you the moment we have that bastard out of office.
Sweetness, I do sincerely love and adore you. I know we have an understanding. I know I can sleep with any human above the age of eighteen on this good, green planet I feel like, but nothing and no one is turning my head.
I make exception for one of my rescuers in particular, but you all still need to move heaven and earth before either of you can be close to me. And I promised that you and I would be exclusive the moment we could be together, so I fear Thorbald might be out of luck unless he gets here days before you do.
Confounding the notion of sleeping with anyone else, the locals just do not flirt with me. Anyone who asks me my name or otherwise pretends I am not the single most famous human walking the good, green earth right now stands no chance with me. And sleeping with me is worth a real, genuine, charming effort.
I also do not want a one night stand. I want what you have. I want a regular lover.
All of this adds up to my sleeping with nobody until you show up despite my being widely regarded as a stinking rich, godly powerful, completely sane, ridiculously fun, benevolently genius, and uncommonly beautiful woman. I am serious. Iowa really has its head up its (expletive) on this one. We all get lonely.
Darling, I love and adore you. I do not mind waiting to be with you. Some might say I have no choice but to wait to be with you, but technically, I would have slept with Nate all those months ago if I was dead set on philandering. Our happy marriage is worth it to me. I love and adore you so much.
Friday, May 31, 2013
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