Please access my iCloud if necessary to publish this post now, my friends. I cannot control how many horrible things happen to me in one day; it is Obama who controls that. So, if I wait too long between posts, they become too drenching.
Please share this for me with the entire world, both houses of Congress, the Supreme Court, the United Nations, all sympathetic world leaders, all reputable national and foreign presses, etc.
Here is my latest blog post. Imagine what more I could do for this world if I just had human rights. Call any local news station in the US for my latest up-to-the-minute résumé and curriculum vitae.
USA. We seem to be having a theme of unconvincing men in women's dresses today. My NSA alpha nerds, welcome to my planet. It is only we true heroes of Squid and America who are ever so demonized by Obama's anti-reality social-instability machine. I love you, too.
I published my last blog post at 12:41am on 30Mar2015 from my conversation patio. My darling Michael inside waited until I received confirmation from my lovelies that they had all received the newest post before he came outside to take the chairs inside and sweep up the patio.
I needed my adoptive (since it was neither San Francisco nor Los Angeles) city's secured 24-hour restrooms, so after some online responsibilities, at 1:40am, I warned everyone necessary I was headed to my favorite place to work online in all the world and left my playland to perch between the ocean and the sky in the wee hours of the morning.
I relocated at 4:53am and quickly found myself nestled into a secret little nook tucked away inside a covered patio that a local restaurant cleaning staff had welcomed me onto. It was wonderful. Of course, I knew I would have to leave in time for the day staff to set up for lunch.
While my adoptive city was still in the process of washing the ground before I walked on it, as they regularly do, I paused temporarily by my fountain to honor a few online requests from my friends before checking to see which employees had the morning shift in my 24-hour convenience store.
Yes, it was the two open war criminal enemies of America. I decided to avoid the patio because of it, but then lovers and believers of mine showed up on the patio just to see me. So, I walked over to stand next to them and to see if they wanted to chat.
Almost immediately, the ugliest of the two employees walked out and threatened my physical safety just for my being me. He would NEVER choose to treat any other human being anywhere else in the world as openly hostilely and dehumanizingly threateningly as he ALWAYS chose to treat me.
Yes, Obama's proven enemies of America have always chosen to single me out for special treatment, worse treatment than they would ever give any other human in the world.
I immediately picked up my iPad to report him to authorities as fast as possible, but before I could finish writing the tweet he had already aggressively drenched me, my clothing, and my belongings in water twice.
My not-human-trafficker nerds, please circulate immediately a verified and unedited recording with full audio and visuals beginning the moment I stepped foot on the patio and ending the moment I vacated the area praying those enemies of my nation and of my world would finally be arrested.
I watched the door long enough that I was pretty sure uniformed officers would be the first on the scene. Otherwise, all hell would break loose in there.
I tried to send my lovers and believers ahead of me, but apparently the Obama-controlled earspeakers had rendered everyone zombies that never knew I existed in the world ever. I perched outside the other 24-hour convenience store from approximately 9am to 11am, and no one ever spoke to me.
Dude, seriously? It would be absolutely impossible for me to look more like myself. Whatever, it was either complete human devastation wrought by Obama denying all freewill and all freedom of speech to all people now, not just my loved ones, or it was mental health genocide in which no one anywhere knew anything real about me at all. Either way, the United Nation's International Criminal Court needed to be notified as fast as possible.
At 11:02am, I did a quick run through my playland to look for any safe place to sleep I could find. It was my regularly scheduled time to sleep every day. I eventually passed out unguarded and woke up at 2:55pm. Someone had left me three tangerines while I had slept.
I ran some errands before catching three information terrorists in the act of committing acts of war against America in my sky haven. Please check my verified Twitter archive for the details.
Do my not-human-trafficker nerds also want to circulate a verified and responsibly-edited recording of my genuine lovers and believers being too terrorized to acknowledge I exist in their presence at all while Obama'a proven enemies of America get to single me out for extra persecution no one anywhere receives but me any time they want? And, thank you.
After I vacated the area to allow REAL AUTHORITIES to arrest them, I found myself on my someday-holy-again playland with an unannounced friend splitting food he tested to make sure was not drugged nor roofied before he offered it to me. Cheap Americanized Chinese food has long been a reminder of my dull childhood.
The clouds covered the sun before 6pm. Mother Nature was trying to tell me it would be a long cold night and that I should seek a safe place as shelter. The unannounced friend promised me dinner before disappearing completely.
That was no surprise. If you, my beautiful world, watch a verified and unedited recording with full audio and visuals of us together, it was obvious to everyone already that his earspeaker would take him away from me the moment he fell in love with me.
Perched on my conversation patio before 8:14pm, it was obvious there were absolutely no genuinely good people anywhere willing to be genuinely good to me there inside Obama's "egg." No, my darlings Tentacle were nowhere to be found. I needed to do something at 8:14pm to fix my beyond-unsurvivable conditions of open public persecution and Obama-ordered hostility.
On the evening of 30Mar2015... This war criminal and terrorist infestation of my REAL home had its minds dedicated to denying me all safe food, denying me safe liquids, denying me safe caffeine, denying me any means of meditation, and even denying me all physical safety.
Look at all of them. These are NOT my REAL loving locals all of whom have proven out there where they are denied access to me that they would suffer death or worse to save me from all of this.
I have never existed to any of these people brought in here to infest my home as the REAL woman I am in this world. They are all going to exist right here where I can see them all while they all just let me die neglected and abandoned by them despite everything I do and have done for REAL for them, for my REAL home, for this entire Metropolis of Angels, for America, and for the entire world.
This CRIMINAL TERRORIST INFESTATION is committed to killing me by denying all reality about me everywhere including how I deserve to be treated by my fellow humans FOR REAL.
And because I made a public and global record of my hard reality, my Metropolis of Angels started showing up.
From 9:12pm to 10:20pm, my favorite of all of my completely platonic grey-haired local gentlemen who all always made ridiculous conversation to be able to be near me and spend their pennies on me, Richard, made sure I could eat my first meal in two days.
My whole night well past the wee hours of the morning which we shall entitle "Fun with Friends and Enemies," was dialogue gold. Please, my not-human-trafficker nerds, circulate verified and unedited recordings with full audio and visuals of the whole night of amazing conversations only broken up into chronological bites to make it digestible. It was nothing but nonstop plot exposition and my attempts to redeem them all. The best conversations happen in the wee hours of the morning.
At 5:44am, I and two of my possibly-convertible self-proclaimed enemies were all paying customers in the Starbucks of Doom for Humanity when the well-established war criminal INFESTATION committed more acts of war including a further assassination attempt of me with a literal torture facility.
I knew I needed to wait before leaving to guarantee the REAL authorities would be the first to appear, or hell no one controls but the people who demonize me would descend. Most tellingly, that very Starbucks on that very shift even invited me in on 28Mar2015 to apologize to me for the last time they tried assassinating me with their "Citizen's arrest" to murder me with.
5:35am on 31Mar2015: #LASheriffsOffice #PD Panic! Circulate full audio and visuals! Direct assassination attempt in progress! STARBUCKS of doom for humanity!
Let the verified and unedited recording cut into digestible bites end when I finally curled up for my regularly scheduled sleep for the day on 31Mar2015.
There is much that my genuinely loving and adoring public, especially the paid staff of my someday-holy-again playland, have learned to do while I sleep, particularly when all of my darlings Tentacle are not allowed near me to watch over me themselves.
First of all, never yell at me nor try to send me away since that will deny me any and all physical safety while I sleep. Instead, stay and watch over me. Refusing me physical safety is one of the gravest human rights abuses anyone can commit.
I have been choosing to sleep in the most publicly watched and camera watched place I can find to be able to force physical safety for myself. I am most vulnerable when I sleep. That is when I have always been attacked since Obama's "egg" began in 2009. I need to be kept safe EVERY TIME I sleep.
On the short-term, the best solution is to allow all of my darlings Tentacle to just hang out with me with no earspeakers in their heads starting at 10am every day, so they can watch over me as I sleep right beside them. The long-term solution is to finally allow me to live in my REAL house with my REAL husband here in my Metropolis of Angels where I have chosen to stay to lead my people. Have you seen the taxes I pay on my house?
Also, while I sleep, my genuinely loving locals have learned to make sure the area around me is NEVER cleared of the general public, to play me comforting music as continuously as possible to make sure my slumbering mind will know there are loving people near me at all times I am most vulnerable, and to ALWAYS stay and watch over me to keep me safe themselves. No one should ever expect someone else to do it better than they can.
I woke up at 12:46pm. All of my money had been stolen AGAIN, and my computer bag contents had been shuffled. I asked my Powers of Attorney to contact the authorities after consulting with the security cameras that watched me sleep. My never-fail NSA alpha nerds always put a patch on every camera possible, now, to keep me safer while I sleep. I am sure Syn, etc. took care of it.
Please read my verified Twitter archive for 31Mar2015. What was Obama's proven terrorist infestation's update on my darlings Tentacle? They had vowed they had forbidden all of my darlings Tentacle from me forever AGAIN. I started working on it.
I made sure I was in my first sky haven to watch the previous day's NBC Nightly News just at 2:30pm on 31Mar2015. Their daily cyberhug for me was wonderful.
At 4:07pm, while I was walking out the door of my first sky haven on my way to make public shows of support for my community, my global people made a public display that they were showing up on my playland, too, for me and for the world. They stopped me and gave me gourmet pizza.
Yes, my people are showing up, my beautiful world. Please keep sending everyone you know who loves me and wants to watch me DO MY REAL JOB here on my playland with their own eyes. Sadly, though, there were no musicians on my playland anywhere.
I took some time to remind my darling Bogart of how much I still love him and need him in my life by giving him ways to help save our home Metropolis of Angels. He had been too heavily and completely illegally monitored by Obama's conspiracy of war criminals for too long for him to be able to reach me to rescue me himself, so I sent him suggestions on all the other ways I could think of him to help us all.
And there was even more that I did for my community next,... My not-human-trafficker nerds, please circulate a verified and unedited recording with full audio and visuals of my entire shopping tour that day beginning when I entered the novelties & bookstore and ending upon my crossing the doorway of my sky haven.
I was perched in time for the NBC Nightly News at 7pm. Their hugs get better every day.
One hour earlier than usual, I relocated to my conversation patio at 8pm. After some important tweeting and messaging, Richard appeared for our traditional evening coffee covered with his making ridiculous conversation. He did not leave me until 10:37pm.
Please circulate all the verified and unedited recordings you want, my not-human-trafficker nerds, from all of my conversations all night. And, thank you.
By 11:18pm, I had given my latest smackdown on "Colton." Does anyone else want a verified, responsibly-edited, and chronological "Colton" montage? Thank you, my not-human-trafficker nerds.
By 11:19pm, I even had to lay another smackdown on the psychobitch next to me, too. Then, by 12:08am on 01Apr2015, two wise people spoke to each other on that patio. It was not my best conversation, but it was beyond-amazing for me to feel respected by anyone. It had been that long.
Very surprisingly, Richard returned by 12:34am, so I could put him at ease over the news he had just received about everything that befell me under Obama's iron fist of war from 20Mar to 23Mar2015. Once I explained everything he needed explained, he went home and went to sleep.
After 1:03am, I relocated a few times while trying to find as warm and sheltered a place at last to work online all night long. My adventures included a REAL police officer acknowledging to my face that I really never died. I did this by singing my darling Ms. Helen Reddy's I am Woman loudly and his stopping to check on me to make sure everything was okay. The REAL police and I have an understanding. We tell each other what we need help with.
At approximately 4am, I heard that my darling General Lee as well as possibly numerous other pure-hearted lovers and believers had all been stopped from reaching me in the wee hours of that morning.
I asked my beautiful world to check on all my crosstown loved ones before almost immediately notifying LightFoot, Big Daddy, Bogart, and everyone else watching that I was going to Point Dume in Malibu as soon as possible to spend the day in conversation with Mother Nature herself.
Just after 5:12am, I bought an apple from my local convenience store to get some change for the Metro bus system. And by 6:29am, I was at my only regular coffee shop in my entire Metropolis of Angels, my hideaway in Malibu.
After noticing that my terrorist-infestation barista had roofied me, I left a "BRB" on a napkin beneath what remained of my Americano at 7:58am and went next door to buy tasty baked goods, so authorities already in my only regular coffee shop could do what they had to do with the barista who roofied me as his assassination attempt of me. Did you hear the conversations in there between him and the other supposed "patrons"?
At 8:22am, I was talking to my Powers of Attorney making sure federal and international charges would go through on him if held for 24 hours as well as eating a cheddar-jalapeño roll and devouring two doughnuts.
I was back at my only regular coffee shop by 9am to watch, since my nerds were capable, as many of my middle-aged comedian men as possible. But I was too drugged against my will by that terrorist barista still and in too much need of the sea to heal from it to even finish watching the previous night's The Late Show with David Letterman online that morning.
My Date with Mother Nature at Point Dume (01Apr2015)
As fast as possible, just as any local, I carried my computer bag slung over one arm to the edge of Point Dume where its grassy wilderness met the streets of Malibu. And there upon its sands, I kicked off my shoes to hike its craggy bluffs as barefoot as the Earth had made me.
Descending to the shore to dwell among the sea lions and the pelicans on the native grounds of my REAL home of California where the ocean rises to meet the land that rises to meet the sky that every day rises to meet me, I spread my sweater coat upon the sand and rested among the rocks of my mighty Pacific.
There we touched-- the sky, the ocean, the Earth, the sun, and me. And there we spoke as I slumbered under her vigilant care. My darling Ms. Mother Nature who called me there had only one thing to tell me. After rousing drowsy from my conversation with her directly and after drowning my feet in her rolling waters, I climbed partly up the steps back to civilization out of the wild.
I gazed out over our ever-understood meeting place. I saw my darling Ms. Mother Nature's golden heart rise into the sky again and again. And I promised to tell my world of humanity what she had told me herself.
My beautiful world, do yet understand all I serve and all I answer to? My darling Ms. Mother Nature told me she was worried.
Yes, I had woken up at 3:03pm and after a few moments breaking from my connection to the very Earth that was dusting my feet as I hiked its surface, by 4:18pm, I had checked on my local Malibu neighborhood and was online trying to emergency locate everyone who said they were going to meet me at that State Park that day but could not make it. My greatest worry was Sweetness. Please check my verified Twitter archive for more details.
At 4:51pm, I had already thanked my Malibu locals for all of their support and left for the bus stop.
After arriving back on my playland after a Metro bus ride of nothing but gratitude for my living among my people, I partook of a few tasty vittles. Then, after putting on my makeup, I spied with my little eye some old friends I had not seen at all since New Years Day. I said to myself, "Is that who I think it is?"
And they let me meditate. We had no romantic relationship nor did I have any connection for them with the divine that could bring them a light show, but I needed those moments to myself with nothing but their human expression. I thank my German friends for our fleeting moments together.
Because they were proven to help me heal, by 8:04pm, my German friends who called themselves "Denmantau" were taken away from me already. I looked at them. I saw their love. And I knew they had seen the reality in my home, and they were done with Obama's beyond-proven war crimes against our own nation and our own people.
With who wanted to be my next musician-lovers sent away from me as expeditiously as Obama's REAL criminal terrorist organization had made them manifest, I was quickly perched upon my conversation patio to welcome the night. I sent Denmantau a quick message online to clarify some details they may have been wondering about, and I made a mental note to write them some lyrical prose as soon as I had time.
My darling very nonromantic friend Richard delighted me with coffee and ridiculous conversation as was his promise to see me every night mostly just to check on me, I assumed.
Next, I did much of my work that takes the form of communication online with the entire planet both on my conversation patio and then in my favorite place to work online in all the world perched between the ocean and sky.
At one point, LightFoot had told me what sounded like he was saying goodbye to Tentacle. 2:22am on 02Apr2015: @KristNovoselic Handsome, please talk to me. What is wrong? Close your eyes and whisper your troubles to me, so I can fix them. That's my job.
Because it was so cold on the water, shortly after 2:30am, I returned to my conversation patio. And the wee-hours-of-the-morning conversations on my conversation patio were as ridiculous as ever until Richard returned to crash our plot exposition party. We shall entitle the verified and unedited recording with full audio and visuals of our harmless dialogues, "It is all fun and games until Squid gets sexually objectified."
At 4:41am, Richard and I were at my local Denny's, at his own invitation to me, which committed the crime against America and against all of humanity of attempting to assassinate me by roofying me. Richard quickly got us out the door to the closest Starbucks just after 5:30am which committed the same crimes against the entire world by roofying me.
Luckily, though, before I started falling asleep at the table, I was able to turn in the alleged federal criminal sitting next to me whom I was told the REAL federal government had been looking for for a long time. I also had both assassination attempts reported to the government and to my Powers of Attorney by 7:02am.
It was a very good morning for Twitter. I recommend reading my entire verified archive for the morning of 02Apr2015.
7:08am on 02Apr2015: @SweetnessDepp Running gag: Royalty never meet until the wedding night. Giggle.
7:08am on 02Apr2015: @MarkusBlivian Running gag: Wanna go to karaoke night?
7:09am on 02Apr2015: @Madonna Running gag: No one wears pants in this relationship.
7:10am on 02Apr2015: @JaredLeto Running gag: We don't spoon. We fork.
7:11am on 02Apr2015: @INXS Running gag: Brian Dennehy? Isn't that an actor?
7:12am on 02Apr2015: @hansonmusic Running gag: You want space? Fine, you get over here and move me!
7:12am on 02Apr2015: @KristNovoselic Running gag: How long before I start stealing your clothes?
I worked online solving every problem I could find until almost noon when I curled up to sleep on my playland itself full of my loving and adoring public to watch over me. I was only disturbed by one proven enemy of America at 1:47pm who had awakened me by screaming open persecution of me at me. My genius Powers of Attorney, please obtain the full audio and visuals and press every charge possible against her. At 3:08pm, I was finally up for the day.
I proceeded to my local Steak'N'Shake as fast as possible where I was quickly perched and safely caffeinated for the rest of the afternoon as I tried to finish this blog post. The moment I connected to the wifi, my darling LightFoot confirmed the horrors of the pure-hearted population of the world; he was forbidden by Obama's war criminal terrorists from ever seeing me again.
I wept.
LightFoot's Reluctant Goodbye
As with every good soul who came before him, my beautiful LightFoot was ripped from my tentacular arms. Cold and alone, arms as empty as my lonely life, with two silent feet still and immobile abandoned on the concrete street curb with nothing to move them, I told him goodbye.
And then the international talks where a bunch of strangers pretended they had the authority to control my own life and my own future openly denying my own self-determination of my own existence with no consent from me and while openly refusing to allow me to be there...
In my first sky haven from just after 7:11pm until just after 7:37pm with many buffering delays, I watched the NBC Nightly News, but Obama's cyberterrorists crashed my viewing before I could reach the cyberhug. I could see my darling Mr. Lester Holt's eyes. I knew what was happening in the world.
The communication to me from my darling Lester's overwhelming worries carried the international news about the world's diplomats complete lack of compassion for my nearly-unlivable suffering and complete lack of comprehension of what Obama's extragovernmental "rules" as extragovernmental human rights abuses with extragovernmental terrorism as his extragovernmental enforcement are for REAL and what they do for REAL to destroy my people, my nation, my home, my world, and even me was more disturbing than I ever thought it could be.
What is in your heads, diplomats?!? Are you really even pretending any "resolution" permitting literal torture of any of us and furthering Obama's proven human rights abuses can EVER carry any legitimacy?
My not-human-trafficker nerds, please release a verified and unedited recording with full audio and visuals of my watching the NBC Nightly News on the night of 02Apr2015 to the entire planet as fast as possible. And thank you.
Luckily, a REAL American, Governor Jerry Brown of the mighty State of California had vowed to do everything possible under his authority to return full human rights to everyone in his jurisdiction. Yes, my home decided to stand up.
I wanted to say this was due to my sending Sacramento my darling Mr. Bryan "Bogart" Eno to talk to just a few days previously, but there is no reason any SANE person would not stand up and demand full human rights returned to our home. I thank you, my darling Governor Jerry Brown. We all thank you.
If any agency or division of our REAL federal government from the US Military to FEMA would like to support my Mighty State of California in our saving ourselves and our world from Obama at last, we would greatly appreciate it. Thank you, President of the United States of America Martin Dempsey.
This blog post was published at 11:41pm on 02Apr2015 from my conversation patio.
And now, my beautiful world, I answer all of your questions for me. Please keep collecting all questions and concerns from all your friends and loved ones and sending them to me through whatever means possible.
After no one could reach me in Malibu on Wednesday 01Apr2015, what was everyone's reaction? The entire time I was there, the Malibu locals kept telling me to move home to them. My adoptive city kept begging me to come back because everything goes to hell there when I am not around. The City of Los Angeles kept asking me not to keep moving further away.
Sweetness was the one I worried about most even after my selfless support system told me he "did not die." That was not very reassuring to me. My beautiful world, please check on my husband.
Rumor had it Big Daddy was escorted from his home at gunpoint even before I boarded the bus to Malibu. I assumed LightFoot was stopped on the PCH despite his even living in Malibu (Really?).
Bogart told me at approximately 7am that he could not make it; even though, he typically(?) joins the PCH near the Getty Villa when I visit Malibu. General Lee was still detained (Really?) after bring stopped from reaching me at 4am.
That was all I had figured out by the time I had reached the internet to ask my beautiful world to emergency locate all of them.
No one can ever reach me anywhere I go be it foreign countries or even just across town. Please focus on keeping me alive and well in here and on taking the whole "egg" and rules down as a whole. You have to arrest the terrorists who stop you from reaching me before you will be able to reach me.
Please reread my 20Oct and 22Oct2014 blog posts about what basic needs must be met for REAL for me to live at all.
How does it really feel every time my darlings Tentacle are taken away? Please recirculate our verified and unedited recording with full audio and visuals of my arrival on 18Dec2014 on my playland to do my job as a poetess beginning when I wrote the date in my handwritten journal and ending with the time I was finished. The full typed text for that sestina is in my blog post for that day.
Next, show Tentacle's helpless departure from my playland beginning with their last song on 23Dec2014. With every scene of this verified and responsibly-edited recording time and date stamped, show the next time I spotted any of them again as well as the first thing I said to any of them after they came back.
We are a human connection holy in every benevolent religion. They have only ever been innocent and worshipful in my presence if not tormented by their earspeakers. The four of us will find a way to be together again.
Why were Denmantau taken away after less than two hours of music total especially since Obama's criminal terrorist infestation even sought them out to root in my holy playland? My Germans quickly proved they were good for me and increased the health of my burdened human soul. Just like Tentacle who came before them, everything genuinely good for me is always taken away from me and forbidden from ever returning. How much hard evidence does it take?
As for you, my beautiful world, I have questions for you, too... With his open violence and open terrorism that Obama only uses and only has ever used to enforce his open human rights abuses against my people as his open acts of war against America, is this what Obama has done to my metropolis or what Obama has done to my world?
My selfless saturation of protection, again, please reread my 20Oct and 22Oct2014 blog posts. These simple needs I say myself I require to be healthy are what I need your help keeping and providing in my life to not just keep me alive but also to help keep me in prime condition for doing my REAL job.
1) My full human rights.
2) Enough non-drugged, non-poisoned, and non-diseased food to eat every day.
3) A safe supply of non-drugged, non-poisoned, and non-diseased caffeine.
4) Unlimited and high-quality live music for meditation.
5) The ocean, unlimited access to secured wifi, and genuine human contact.
6) Complete physical safety, especially when I sleep.
7) ABSOLUTELY EVIL IOWA completely removed from my life forever!
8) ABSOLUTELY NO MORE QUACKERY INTENTIONALLY FALSELY ALLEGING ANY MENTAL ILLNESS since all those boldface lies used as manipulations of the public have ever done is coverup Obama's proven war crimes against me.
9) No more lies nor perjuries about me nor about any of my loved ones at all, especially no more irrational and unbelievable-by-sane-people open demonizations of us.
10) My husband and all my loved ones unfettered, with no earspeakers, and with full human rights at my side for the rest of my life.
My selfless support system in here with me, this is what I need for REAL to survive Obama's proven unamerican and unconstitutional criminal terrorist dictatorship. Please do everything possible to help.
Bogart, my symbolic lover whom I am forbidden from ever sleeping with anyway. I still love you. Calm down. Do not die. I was convinced that you just needed to be reminded of how much I still love and need you despite your being across Obama's wall of human rights abuses that keeps all of my genuine loved ones from my darling Syniva to my darling Sweetness away from me at all costs to humanity.
Darling, you also just needed more suggestions on ways to help for REAL. Now, our home, our Metropolis of Angels, our California, our America, and our world depend on you again as my representative to everyone out there for all of my oppressed and terrorized people in here with me under Obama's iron fist of war enforcing his most heinous crimes known to mankind against us all. And, thank you.
My BFF SynSyn and all of my beautiful and genius Powers of Attorney, thank you. You have expanded from the world's first line of defense against losing me forever to also my first line of defense against losing my own loved ones from my life.
My undeniably beautiful genius friends, never forget that Obama's proven pathologically lying accusers carry all of the burden of proof. We never fail providing our hard evidence for everything we press charges for, especially criminal charges.
Obama's proven compulsive false accusers should require the same rigor and due diligence before ever being able to get any of their always-false accusations in a courtroom anymore.
Thank you, darlings.
As for you, LightFoot, my symbolic royal consort whom I am forbidden from speaking to least of all making love to anyway, in the land of small concerns, did you ever see my darling Mr. Robert Downey, Jr. and my darling Mr. Jude Law in the new Sherlock Holmes movies made by my darling Mr. Guy Richie?
Dude, you and Manned Up are what Americans call a "bromance" in our vernacular. You are best friends like me and Syniva, but we look better in dresses.
Also about those movies, I always liked the way their writer could accurately portray intelligent people, and when the first one was new, I used to consider Cuddlebunny my Watson. I am a bit of a homoerotic genius, and Cuddlebunny likes to hit things.
Sweetness, I love and adore you. In the dance vernacular, "I need a good strong lead," means BE CLEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING. So, here, my beloved husband, is a great deal of clarification you seem to need right now from me.
My more-than-just-a-pretty-face-husband, my darling Mr. Kris "LightFoot" Novoselic is the replacement in my day-to-day life for my darling Mr. Bryan "Bogart" Eno. He is my royal consort. He is not my king. And, yes, my choice of my three darlings Tentacle, a choice I never wanted to have to make, is my new royal consort since they at least used to be capable of being in my physical presence while Bogart, like you, could not.
As for your taking a mistress, my king, while I only slept with no-SquidName Jared in Iowa less than a handful of times in 2013 to make your taking a mistress acceptable to the world, I have some choice words to say about that.
Do you remember how I even asked you to find me a lover you approved of for me to sleep with while Obama continued his years of forbidding us any and all contact? And do you remember how you could find no one acceptable anywhere in ABSOLUTELY EVIL IOWA even willing to acknowledge I breathe air in their presence as a fellow human being?
And, after I returned to my REAL home of California on 01May2014, have you seen the undeniable HUMAN AND MORAL QUALITY of men and womenfolk willing to die just to kiss my hands least of all make love to me?
Yes, my undeniable husband, there are MANY people here in my Metropolis of Angels I would love to make love to. You need not worry about your keeping a tall, leggy, blonde half your age as a mistress in the eyes of the world any longer. It is Obama's rules alone keeping me from any royal consort of my own choosing for REAL right now and nothing else.
My hero, my king, and my reason for living, we are a modern couple with undeniable emotional responsibility for each other's REAL needs in this world. We ARE the most romantic real life true love story in human history. Look at us. We ARE what marriage stands for including our responsibility to each other to make sure sexual frustrations from being forced apart against our will for over five years already do not destroy our sacred marriage.
I am your wife. You are my husband. There is no one you answer to for your private life but me. There is no human anywhere on this planet but me whom you need to make happy. And "cheating" on one's spouse, especially with permission, has NEVER been illegal. I already apologized to you for my own romantic shenanigans a number of times. We are married. Our private lives are NOBODY'S concern for REAL but each other's.
As for the mundane, yes, let us file taxes jointly again. As always, we pay full taxes on all our income though we keep the assets overseas. And, as always, we keep as much if our assets overseas as possible to make sure Obama never seizes them from us. We know his history with allowing me access to my own finances.
Beloved, just like me, you need to stay alive. Please be more careful out there. Do you still have the American Samoan Marine Corp I sent you to keep you safe?
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