Friday, December 31, 2010

The Last Post of the Year

I actually had the occasion to make it out of the house to see some friends twice this week. With any luck, the car situation will turnaround for me over the weekend. I might finally be allowed to take the car out. I am an amazing driver; there is no reason I should not be allowed to drive a car.

I also made it to the chiropractor twice this week. Because I am so persecuted by the US government, we were not allowed to discuss all of the problems he must have found when he looked at my health holistically. I have serious trauma from the years of torture I have endured. Yes, I am healing now. I even play music as I sleep to help.

There are things in this world of which I simply am not capable, and I admit to them all. One of them is wearing sensible shoes. I put on a pair of tennis shoes on Monday to go to a Zumba class at the local YMCA. I had only barely broken a sweat when my feet rebelled against me. My arches hurt so much I had to take off the shoes, and then I learned that all of the rest of my feet had gone numb. If there is Zumba in my future, it will be danced in red satin t-strap stilettos or, more likely, barefoot. I cannot wear sensible shoes.

I am thinking about finally applying to the MFA in Creative Writing program at Naropa University in Boulder, Colorado. The degree is low-residence, so I will be able to take my courses online from the comfort of my netbook. Education is so important to me, and my medium of choice for spreading knowledge and enlightenment around the world is the written word. It is time I procured my MFA.

Tonight is New Year's Eve! I plan on dancing. I am going to a local rock show, assuming I can get a ride there, in Des Moines. Oh, it has been far too long since I have had live music to dance to freely.

In the News...

Latest in the Ivory Coast
Look at that! They are having diplomatic intervention in the Ivory Coast. This is a good thing. The violence and unrest needs to be brought to an end. Yey!

There are also talks in the works to release and diminish tensions between the two Koreas. It's almost like my beautiful world listens to me when I say these things I am never allowed to know anyone ever reads or hears. Let us all hope we can bring a lasting peace to the Korean Peninsula. They have seen so much violence and unrest.

"An Eye for an Eye Only Makes the Whole World Blind. My Orange Juice, Please." --Ghandi
And now for the latest in the Obama administration's lack of maturity: We no longer have an ambassador from Venezuela. Obama needs to grow up and stop being a tantrum-driven brat.

Sometimes We Need to Take a Stand.
Even if it makes us unpopular with people more powerful than we are, sometimes we need to take a stand on what we feel is right. I am not taking sides in this. I am just commenting on the personal strength displayed instead of the politics.

Refuse to Comply
Discuss (and associate) any topic you want with anyone you want... so long as you do not slander, defame, etc. anyone. Do not comply with social oppression and removal of the freedom of speech. We all know the rules... do not lie about anyone, do not steal your human expression from anyone, and respect each other's privacy. As long as you keep with these restrictions of dignity, let no one tell you that you cannot express yourself with anyone you want... even me.

Drinkable Water
Drinkable water is so important. Let no one take it away from you. The water supplies were poisoned and drugged in San Francisco, Mexico City, Wigan (UK), and Liverpool while I was there. The people just let it happen. Stand up for yourselves and let no one take drinkable water away from you. Looking at the world populations, it is far more rare than it should be.

Oil will Always be Precious, but...
... it is time we found new ways of powering our machines. Solar, wind, geothermal, etc. power are endless. They do not require the poor to spend their meager moneys to bring power into their lives. When are we bringing greener energies to the poor of the world? They need it most. Oil will always be precious but not as precious as ending human suffering.

Keep your own Economy Strong to Prevent the World's Economy from Falling Apart
The global economy will not fail apart just because of certain amounts of gross governmental mismanagement of finances in certain countries. As long as we keep our economies as strong as possible, the world's money will keeping turning. This is not a global crisis as long as we are still investing and spending.

Do not Fall for It.
Do you remember how we in the US all lived in crippling irrational fear of the USSR during the Cold War? Let us not let it happen again. From what I can tell, the US government has been trying to make the American people irrationally non-trusting of Middle Eastern cultures for years now. There is no reason for this irrational mind control. Do not allow the government to make you fear a people or a culture just because they want control over you. Take cultures on a person-by-person basis to start with if you have to... The government wants us afraid and controlled. Never give up your freedom to think, believe, and choose.

Why are We Doing This Again?
Why are we killing civilians? Is it the US government trying to provoke conflict again? There are never answers to these questions because in the US right now the truth is off limits. I believe the US government wants the US to have an enemy. They want a people or a culture to make all Americans hate, so they can control us with that hate. To do this, they are running around the world provoking conflicts. Do not fall for it.

Cultural Understand and Education Might Save us All.
Promote understanding of your own culture and people with everyone you can. Until recently, there was no reliable way to explain to people in Iran that Americans are not all oppressive warmongers like the US government. Also learn about as many other cultures as you can. Grow to love and understand as many people as your heart can handle. Yes, even I am only a human who feels fear and hatred... but I am teaching myself to embrace knowledge and understanding instead. Learn about new cultures every chance you get. Learn to appreciate our beautiful world.

Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité -- Did I get that in the right order?
Standing up for our human rights is so important. We all should have a freedom to assemble and associate. We should all have a freedom to believe as we choose. We should all have a freedom of speech and a freedom to criticize... as long as we call an opinion an opinion. We should all have a right to hear what people say about us. We should all have a right to privacy. There is so much that the US government denies its citizens right now.

Israel Should not be Considered an Accurate Representation of the World's Jewish Populations.
What crawled inside Netanyahu's heart and died there? Yes, there is a legacy of conflict with Palestine in Israel; they are one country with two governments right now... but Netanyahu is particularly out of control. Why is it the Israeli people are allowing it to just go on? Why are they allowing this blood on their hands? Just as the American people cannot be represented by the US government to the world right now, the world's Jewish population should not be judged by the actions of Israel. The good Jewish people are better than propagating human rights violations.

It All Comes Down to Leadership.
And it looks like something has been a good influence on Iranian leadership lately. I wish I could make better analysis and conclusions, but it is so hard for me to get all encompassing news.

Weather Here has been Oddly Mild.
The Des Moines Area has missed the worst of the winter weather so far, and the worst of the blizzards that hit Europe did not land until after I left their continent. With all of the crazy weather this season all over North America, we here have been truly blessed that it missed us. Yes, the weather and I have an understanding, but I do not even pretend I could ever tell her what to do. All we have had was a gently snow just in time for Christmas. I hope everyone out there is taking care and being careful on the roads. I hope your flights are rescheduled soon, and I hope everyone researches the Water Cycle to understand why the weather is changing.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Every Love

Every love should be freedom. Everyone should love with all the passion of their soul let loose upon their beloved. Let nothing stop your love.

Love should not make you self-conscious. Love should not make you destructive... unless it is to barriers between you. Love should not make you jealous, paranoid, nor non-trusting. Love cannot be less than the purest expression of the human heart.

Love is power. Wield it mercilessly.

Love with your entire body, your entire existence, your entire being. You will never know what you are capable of until you send such love into the world to romp and play and propagate among other human souls.

I have a love like this, but sadly he must share my heart with my love for all the world. Luckily, the human heart has infinite love to give.

Happy New Year

I can already see that 2011 will be a beautiful year indeed. How do I know? No, it is not because my mom constantly wants me to go shopping for new clothes. (She has never liked how I dress myself.) No, it is not even because life could not get worse than my 2009 and 2010 were to me. Let us just call it an understanding of the workings of the universe. The birds told me justice is coming.

Now, my New Year's resolutions... What am I going to do to make my beautiful world and myself better in 2011?

I resolve to...
1.) do a little something everyday to bring world peace,
2.) do a little something everyday to prevent human annihilation of the environment,
3.) stand in the way of human rights violations on every level,
4.) dance more often than I did last year (It is how I meditate, after all.),
5.) end this bullshit...
...all in 2011. Clearly, my dedication to bringing humanity through Global Climate Change is much more long term.

I also have New Years wishes for my beautiful world. I wish everyone peace, love, true beauty, freedom, and justice in 2011. If you pursue this for yourselves, then the universe might even bring this all to little ole me this year, too. It also really ticks off those that oppress you and persecute me when you all stand up for yourselves. Hee-hee! This year is going to be fun.

Monday, December 27, 2010

Two final notes for the day...

Here is a photo of my face as it looked while I was watching David Letterman tonight... just in case anyone out there was curious.

And from the News...

Obama and Latin America
Sadly, Obama's influence was all over Mexico City while I was there in February this year. He just refused to bother to do anything useful. I wonder sometimes if our current president is more impotent or corrupt.


I have found the local news on Channel 8 (CBS) far more accurate and reliable than the local news on Channel 5 (ABC) both out of Des Moines, Iowa. If that changes, I will let you know. That said and on a related note, there are many ways to get rid of slanderers. I believe that tracing lies to where they come from and naming that source openly and publicly as a slanderer is the best way to go. I do not and cannot trust news from Channel 5 (ABC) because of this.

If we publicly point out all of the slanderers, then we will be left with only reliable sources of information. Do you or do you not want to know the truth? This is your job, my beautiful world, in all of this. Getting rid of the slanderers is up to you. It takes a lot before I can hear the lies... but that Channel 5 (ABC) leaks like a seive.

Yes, I stayed in all day yesterday, and I do not plan on going out today until I run errands and hit the gym with my mom. I cannot wait for New Years Eve!

Sunday, December 26, 2010

What are you up to for New Years Eve?

I plan to go see a local rock show on New Years Eve. It is either that or stay home alone, but I feel a need to be out among good people these days. It will be good for me, and I have so much self-healing that still needs to happen. Maybe I will even get some dancing in.

Christmas with my family was delightful. I received many wonderful gifts this year. It seems my family is very worried about the warmth of my feet and hands; gloves, mittens, socks, shoes, slippers... I got them all. There was actually very little puking, all things considered, but something somehow went wrong with the goat cheese we think. Today is Boxing Day, and they are all at Sunday morning mass while I, the family a(e)theist, sit here blogging.

I had a chance to see a dear old friend for coffee on Christmas Eve afternoon. It is wonderful to catch up with friends I have known for decades. As always, just when I think the art of conversation is dead, I am rescued by friends and family. He was a spoken delight.

In the news...

Ivory Coast
He says there will be civil war if he is physically removed from office. Sadly, the country is already in a civil war of beliefs and ideas.  They need a peaceful, diplomatic intervention. They need a person or people respected by both presidents to walk into their fire and bring a solution. Meanwhile, Gbagbo is not showing any signs he is worthy of leading a people in anything other than a forced military state. He is digging himself into a hole of dictatorship. How is he supposed to face the world that way?

Tensions are still High in Korea.
Well, yes, if the South at the request of the US government keeps the tensions high on purpose tensions will stay high. We need tensions in the area to cool off, but all the US wants to do is fire guns right by the border. We all have a version of what is going on.  But you cannot deny that if you actually want tensions to lessen, you will not set off military drills in North Korea's face. If the South truly does not want the North to set off nuclear weapons, they would not aggravate them into needing to do it. Who is the real aggressor? Someone wants a war, and it is not North Korea... but they will defend themselves.

Still with the Austerity Measures?
We have been through this so many times. Yes, you need to do something to fix your economies, but the way your austerity measures are designed, you will stunt your economies even further. Think of your economy as a railroad for a moment. The railroad is broke and needs to make money. If you reduce stops and remove trains in order to spend less money, fewer people will be able to ride the train lines with hopes of getting anywhere they need to go. The railroad will lose even more money, Instead, you need spend money to make the train lines better, so that more people will spend their money to ride the trains. Then, the railroad will make money again. You need to invest in your economies to make them grow and flourish.

The Pope is Publicly Active these Days.
Then again, with what little news I get, the Pope may have been out publicly spreading peace and love with official statements for much longer. He has been taking an active role in sorting out the problems of the Catholic church concerning abuses of children, and he has done it with public knowledge. There is a time and place to be open and public about what you do, and there is a time to keep private. Each person should have control of this for her or himself. The Pope and I still differ on views of the queer populations, but that is just going to make for some great communication some day. I have been meaning to write him a letter for a while now... I should really brush up on my Latin.

The real question: Why did he not bother sooner?
Obama knows he needs to get on my good side. He also knows these past few weeks since the election were his last chance to lead (party-wise) any legislative action to show he actually did something at all while president other than make everything worse. Apparently, the wake up call got through to him. Is it a turnaround or is he covering his backside?

The People
My beautiful world. thank you for listening to me for so long. I just want to give you all a quick reminder that the people of the US are not always appropriately represented by our government. Americans, even the tourists, are good people. The government is just a mess.  But the people are taking power these days, and we are going to sort out our government. We are a democracy, after all. It is about time Washington remembered the definition of "democracy."

The Troops
The US troops are another example of this. They are not the warmongers; they are the ones that die because of warmongers. I really wish I had a chance to go out and visit them... maybe some military hospitals... maybe a little singing and dancing. Such good people...

As a final note...
And they say no one reads books anymore. As a writer, I am always delighted to learn when people get all excited about a book. They say children are losing their attention spans due to video games and the technology of immediacy. If we could just get them excited about books again, we could counteract all of that immediacy. There is no reason to get rid of all of the technology or even dislike it, but we need to keep our children's minds rich with a plethora of activities while they are developing. Never forget about books or other patience related activities. Read to your babies, so they will read for themselves.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

The Day to Day and a Lot of News

I had the joy of watching live tennis exhibitions on Tuesday and Wednesday this week. It made me crave Swiss chocolates and the Spanish sun, and the pong of the tennis ball put me in my happy place. Healing takes so many different forms.

I ran most of my errands-- all of them, in fact, except for seeing my chiropractor-- in time for my mom's birthday yesterday. We had a nice dinner last night to celebrate her 64th (pronounced sexty-fourth) year in this world, and dad bought her an ice cream cake. With everything that goes on in this world, it was nice to have some quiet family time.

In order to fight off the condition my poor beat up body has been left in due to the chemicals forced on me in the UK, I went to the gym at the local YMCA Monday and Tuesday this week and did ballet bar work here in the house yesterday morning. I forgot how easy it is to build up muscle when full of testosterone. While the stick runs its course, this exercising thing will be so much more effective!

I have had a lot of sister bonding time over the last few days. I am really going to miss those two when they go home. At least we're all in the same country, now, so seeing each other will be so much easier. It has been a very long time since I laughed this much.

The people here in Iowa have proved to be very warm and friendly. It has been so long since people have openly treated me well, and their behaviors towards me are very welcome indeed. They treat me with the respect any human is due. It is about damn time.

In the news...

The Ivory Coast is a mess. There is so much in this world I wish I had the freedoms to help fix. They need a diplomatic intervention.

Something lit a fire under Obama. For once he is bothering to be more than toad slime. I wonder if he is trying to win (someone like) me over to thinking of him as a president instead of a waste of human skin. If that is his goal, he has a hell of a lot of work ahead of him. It starts with him ending his continued oppression of my surroundings and his open persecution of me, my person, my mind, and my body.

A company in Spain is investing time and energy in Iowan wind farming. This is a very good thing for our world. Iowa and I have differing opinions of biofuel; I do not think food should be used to move cars around. But, I love Iowa's wind farms. Renewable energy is a big and important part of humanity's future.

The US has been aggravating the military state of North Korea by having massive drills with South Korea only 15 miles from the shared Korean border. What does the US government think it is trying to accomplish? North Korea definitely seems unhappy and threatened by the armed forces to its south preening like peacocks. And according to at least one of the articles below, the US is "unimpressed" with the verbal threat that North Korea has made. So, in effect, the US government is doing nothing but warmongering. They are trying to provoke North Korea into attacking first, so South Korea can say it is only defending itself. These are real people, real countries, and real homes, but these are play things to the US government.

Peace, freedom, and empowerment takes whatever form it needs in a crisis. The world needs heroes.

Haiti is a mess. They need someone to take charge there to force the rebuilding to begin and be completed in a timely and organized manner. They survived hurricane season this year in tent cities, but for how many years will they have to? Was this not supposed to be fixed by now? Oh, wait, that was something Obama was led the way on... Let's hope a real leader who actually cares about the people of Haiti gets this taken care of.

The president of Iran listens. Iran is mentally prepared for the world once we are past nuclear technology. Is anyone else? Israel clearly is not.

In fact, I have been worried about Israel lately. For one, they are led by Netanyahu... He is the monster who was chief of the UN Security Council when the clearly international "Code of Silence" was slapped on me. Secondly, the state of Israel has been irrational and aggressive recently. Gaza is a mess and is full of more human rights violations than my life since early 2009. I worry that all of this is permitted by the Israeli people due to chips in their heads. There is some sort of mass social control going on there that is allowing Netanyahu to run rampant with no accountability.

A dictator got his due. This is what justice looks like. We shall see this soon with a number of other countries in the coming two years. Our world is a mess due to dictatorial leaders of supposed democracies questing ignobly for personal power and cruel glory. This is just the beginning.

I am an a(e)theist, but even I need a Christmas miracle this year. I need this over. May the right time for the universe to approve happen as soon as possible. And may all of your Christmas miracles come true as well...! No matter what your religion may be, may all of your beautiful dreams and wishes come true. Happy Holidays, beautiful world... and may the universe bless!

Monday, December 20, 2010

It's Almost Christmas.

Well, it looks like I was wrong. There is no longer a Blues on Grand. So, when I finally had a ride to drop me off somewhere, I went to the House of Bricks just east of the river in Des Moines and caught a metal show. I need to get out more often.

My sisters arrived in town a day earlier than planned. We have had much sister bonding time since. Luckily, this year we have had much laughing.

I am still trying to locate all of my belongings that I had in my room in San Francisco. They are all in the basement somewhere in boxes. I could really use my purple dipping pen, and I promised my Moetai tiki idol to someone long ago.

My Christmas is shopping finished, at least. I just need to get to the post office. Oh well, gifts will be late this year. I do not think anyone will mind.

This week I hope to see the chiropractor, get a haircut, and procure new glasses. It's also my mom's birthday on Wednesday. I should be able to see a dear, old friend Tuesday night, but that depends on how her winter health is. There is a bug going around. I also think I might take up yoga.

In the news...

Korea, plese stay calm and rational. Yes, always defend yourself when attacked... but never attack first. There is no active attacking going on right now, so there is no need to call up arms to defend yourself. There is another solution.  Just try.  Do not let the US government gode you into war.

Ivory Coast
The part that resonates most with me is the part that reports on the media. The state televison is controled by the dictator, so the public is still largely unaware. That went on and still goes on here in the US concerning me and is a reason I hate the British media so much. They forgot about telling the truth somehow.

At times of political stalemate, there is always another solution... The Ivory Coast did not get the message, but Iraq did.

European Weather
I do not control the weather. I did not leave a trail of snow in my wake to blanket the UK once I made it free of them. The weather and I just have an understanding. That is, I understand the weather. Do you all remember the water cycle?

Well, there is now more water in it than there used to be. This means not only are the ocean levels going to be higher, but there will also be more precipitation, more clouds, and just plain more water in the world. This is Global Climate Change.

Lunar Eclipse
It's on my mom's birthday! Let's all go watch.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Hello, Beautiful World, from Me in Iowa.

First and foremost, let me apologize, my beautiful world, for being quiet for so long. The Polk County District Court was not done with me when they gave adult guardianship over me to my abusive father. They also made sure I would be hospitalized the moment I stepped foot outside of the Des Moines International Airport. Yes, I admit that the UK did nothing but harm me and that I need to heal, but I could have used an explanation for being stuck in a hospital again. I am still neither a risk to harm others nor suicidal. Legally speaking, you must be at least one to be detained in a hospital. Well, I got myself out on Tuesday.

I have been stuck here in the house pretty much ever since. My parents have a case of mono-car. That means there is one car for three of us. This also means I am not allowed to take the car out to go do anything. There is nothing in walking distance and no public transportation. As a result, I am stuck in the house all day and night unless I can convince my mom to take me out to run errands after she gets home from work. I am ready to call a taxi to go to the local coffee shop tomorrow afternoon. I might actually do it.

My first day back here at THE HOUSE was the first occasion my dad had since I made it to Iowa to be verbally abusive towards me. My mom had taken me out to do my Christmas shopping, and I ran in THE HOUSE afterwards to immediately hide her and Dad's gifts. I was immediately and verbally violently berated by him for wearing shoes in the house. I did not yell back at him. I do not yell back. I have been going through hell since early 2009. You would think he could bother to have a little compassion.

THE HOUSE has a new kitchen, and that kitchen has already been the site of much of my cooking and dancing. Other changes of note include the new geothermal heating system in the basement and the new county sewage line being built through the back yard. My dad also now has three offices in the house. He has one on each floor; they are in the basement, the family room, and the guest room. Neither my mom nor I have even one. I have not been made welcome in THIS HOUSE.

Iowa as a whole has been friendly enough since I arrived, though. There is a huge exhibit on Leonardo Da Vinci at the Science Center of Iowa, and Blues on Grand is still up and running. Maybe I will have a chance to go out and see something once my sisters get here for the holidays. They will be bringing a car with them.

As a final note, I was wrong about the three-month testosterone stick that was inserted under my skin against my will in my sleep in the hospital in the UK. It is more of a one-year stick. I am almost to six months with it under my skin, and the symptoms have only worn off enough for it to be a one-year stick. My body is still too funny-shaped, still producing too much hair, and still storing fat in my belly instead of my normally more womanly hips.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

For Iowa

I travel home on Thursday. Yey!

Iowa, I have taken good care of you while over here. PLEASE refuse to comply with the federal government. PLEASE refuse to mistreat me just to be near me. PLEASE stand up for your own rights, clean water supply, and self-maintained social order. PLEASE refuse to ever allow a chip in your head. PLEASE do and discuss whatever you damn well please while I am there. PLEASE do not allow the federal government to control you. I am asking you to maintain your own rights and freedoms with hopes it brings me mine.

I am begging you.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Tentative Travel Date

Because the quack-whore, Dr. Helen Reynolds, simply must be as much of a pain as possible, I have a tentative travel date for two weeks from now instead of the freedom to leave as soon as possible. Someone needs to spit in her face for me. Meanwhile, the City of Liverpool's inability to maintain sidewalks when it snows has kept me indoors these past couple of days. I cannot wait for the day I have good news to report instead of constantly being ticked off. I cannot wait to see the back side of the UK.

I am NOT looking forward to life with my abusive father again. Tom Varilek, my dad, is probably rehearsing verbal abuse right now that he wants to dish out at me. I am NOT the Polk County District Court. I did NOT grant my asshole of a father, Thomas Raymond Varilek, adult guardianship over me. This is NOT my doing. I am NOT even a citizen nor resident of Iowa. Yet, Tom perjured himself in order to gain adult guardianship over me, and he is already weilding it cruelly.

Someday my life will be happy. Someday when Obama gets his head out of his ass, I will have human rights, again. Someday I might even have the freedom to get a job. I will never be grateful for all of the horrors that have been my life landing on me and tormenting me ever since 2009. Let us hope 2011 brings an end to all of this.

China, thank you for listening.

Here I am blowing kisses to the world!

Monday, November 29, 2010

So Close!

Hello World!
I am so close to going back to the States. My travel date should be waiting for me when I get back to the hospital tonight. If I don't learn when tonight, I will over the next few days. I cannot wait.

(And Wiki Treason? Are you serious? Does the US government really want it on record that it is calling telling-people-the-truth grounds for treason? Tell Obama to get his head out of his ass and tell the truth for once himself.)

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Today's News

When will people learn? Does anyone listen?
You cannot create peace with war. Violence breeds violence. This is happening because Washington has been trying to aggravate a World War Three for years. The Middle East would not comply, but if the Koreas are not careful, they will be home to World War Three. The fighting will be in their home. Please, Korea, listen to me. Listen to me in ways Washington never will. You do not want to be the decimated home to a global conflict. Do not let Washington nor anyone for that matter goad you into war. There will be no Korea left if the war is fought on your land, in your air, and in your water.

Did anyone learn from Greece?
Greece’s austerity measures caused a downward spiral, so that now they are generating very little revenue. Yes, the Irish economy was unsustainable, but they need to fix the economy. They should not be creating greater problems. Keeping the corporate tax rate low means they have the right goals, but are these the right steps to help them reach those goals? Just make sure you do not stunt the economy. You need to help an economy grow if you want to see it create more tax revenue.
And now, Portugal…

The weak are quaking.
In expectation of the truth being told, the US government is already quaking and shrieking in fear. Public accountability: It has spawned a witch hunt of the founder of Wikileaks. The US government does not like being held accountable for what it does. I signed an online petition the other day to protect government whistleblowers. I doubt we will ever see legislation designed to protect those that want the truth told, but I figured it could do little harm.

In response to panic,...
My thoughts are with the survivors and those that survive the victims. The deaths mar the beauty of the celebration. What a horrible end for any festival and for so many human lives. Mass panic makes people make bad decisions. It brings social ruin. I have been blessed with an amazing gut instinct in any crisis. But when the panic hits a population instead of a person,...

Ha! You’re still talking!
Just when I thought everyone had put off talking about the environment in order to talk about saving money, look what site I found! (When are we going to get the plastic out of the oceans? Doctors are starting to find plastic in human bloodstreams from our food chain base now being ocean plastics.) Climate change: My mission is to get humanity through Global Climate Change. The best thing to do is stay calm and make wise decisions. We have to DO things, not just talk about them.
When might you do something, too?

Democracy, you double-edged sword…
Elections are a good thing if they are fair and free. They are democracy in action. But the process of free speech and campaigning can lead to violence in less stable nations. That is the double-edged sword of democracy. It requires that opinions other than just the ones you like must also be heard. Please stay peaceful, Ivory Coast. Please ensure safe, fair, and free elections.

If you harm education, you harm the future.
Public education is one of the most vital roles of a government. Education shapes the future of your country. UK, you have angry students; you have an angry future.
Students are protesting in Italy, too.

Sweet Charity
This is how a charity is supposed to work. The money comes in, and the promised goodness comes out. Has anyone out there experienced a bad charity? You know, one that took in money and delivered absolutely no goodness? What about one that took in money and used it to attack whom it was supposed to be helping? This is not time to be shy! Has anyone out there experienced the bad sorts of charities? It is okay to answer.

Please tell me why, again.
What are we doing in Afghanistan, again? No, Washington, sorry, but your actions in Afghanistan have not yet started the World War Three you are after. Please cease and desist aggravating less stable countries, now. It did not work in the Middle East, and it did not work in Afghanistan either.

I think I just said it. I’ll say it again. Washington, stop aggravating less stable nations. Look, US government, you need to be careful where you tread. You make a poor ambassador so often for the American people. We are not about hatred and warmongering.

A Real Man
It must feel better than if Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger called you a ‘girly man.’ Though, this is much less funny.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Tennis Coverage

Oh, the simple joys that make life worth living! For this entire week the UK has coverage of the ATP Men's World Tour Finals being played in London. Live tennis coverage is just about the top of my list including good books, live music, and conversations with dear, old friends and family for things that make life worth living. Mmmmm... raspberries, snail-mail, orgasms, dancing in a warm rain, talking to animals... Okay, the list is not as short as I though it was.

The paperwork necessary for my return to the States is progressing as fast as could be expected. Once I have an intinerary, I will let you know my return date. Iowa, here I come. I hope you're ready. None of this doing what Obama wants and harming me at every turn, again, okay? I love you. I have been taking care of you from across the pond. Now, stand up for yourselves and treat me right. Demand your own rights, and maybe I will get mine.

France, I will be there as soon as I can. California, I will return home. Just you wait and see. I have a whole lot of this beautiful world to see and thank.

I am much physically rounder than I am used to being. It comes from being the walking chemistry experiment of the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds. Luckily, the testosterone is wearing off nicely. Now, I just have to get the rest of the chemicals out of my body.

She is such a quack. In the event that travel plans for me take longer than 11December2010, the day my Section 3 under the Mental Health Act of 1983 ends, she would rather 'section' me with another six-month Section 3 than let me out of the hospital. It would really help if the British would stand up for what is right, but they are too busy being brainwashed zombies. Podpeople!! EVERYWHERE!!!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

On my mind and in the news....

I now have eight hours a day to spend off of the ward. When they started letting me out of the hell they call a hospital on a daily basis, I had to go get a watch. Now, for the first time in decades, I wear a wrist watch. It has always felt odd having time shackle my left wrist, but that is exactly how I feel. I am enslaved by time, right now. I will not be free of the UK for two to four more weeks, and in the mean time I am still stuck here tethered to the hell they call a hospital with an eight-hour chain.

And when I go back to the States, what am I supposed to expect? Is it just more of the same? I think it will be worse. This time I will again have no rights but this time also no freedoms due to being under my overbearing father’s thumb? My father, Thomas Raymond Varilek of Ankeny, IA, joined the legions of people oppressing me last year in May.

Don’t be like my father. Don’t do what they want. Don’t be cruel to me and stomp on my well-being just because I am there. Iowa was horrifying the last time I was there. I hope they will no longer be pawns of the US government this time. I hope Iowa will stand up for itself, break the bubble, and refuse to comply with the Federal horror controls. They take away all of your rights, too, you know. Absolutely NEVER let anyone put a chip in your head.

From the news…

Putin to the rescue.

In at time of international crisis, at least we have Russia… and they brought twelve other nations as friends. Let’s hope some good work comes from this. Our planet is in peril, and we need action. We can save this world, but we need to bother to do something. There is no longer any place for complacency.

Do schools still teach civics and geography?

At a time when public education is getting cut all over the place, it is an important question to ask. Then again, why a school system should be forced to cut any part of the curriculum to save money is beyond me. Art, music, and drama are just as important as math and science to a full education. Literature and social studies are so vital to our schools. They are what make us human.

The Catholics are making progress.

Sex abuse by clergy is finally being addresses by the Church itself. It is important to address problems and not ignore them. The Pope has really taken healing his flocks seriously concerning child abuse, and he is the first pope to openly deal with this issue. Let us hope it helps the children heal knowing that the abuse is being stopped from within the Church itself.

What was the last thing Obama did…

…that did not make things worse? What is this expenditure of lives supposed to accomplish? The role of the military is to protect and DEFEND the United States of America at all costs. It is NOT to aggravate more volatile nations and militant extremists.

Ballerina Maya Plisetskaya turns 85.

You have made an art out of being strong when you are delicate, pretty lady. Keep shining.

Intellectual Property Protection

It protects our ideas. Imagine you were writing a book, but every time you wrote a paragraph, it was common knowledge due to an illegal broadcast of everything you do at your computer. Would there be any way you could sell your book? Would there be any reward of publication for all of your hard work? Intellectual property needs to be protected. Without it, art ends.

Obama the Monster

Obama’s reign as president has been a terror to my life in particular and a hunt for dictatorial powers in general. The lowest rung on his ladder is his policy of enforcing that the public not acknowledge all of the terrors they know he does to me from television shows broadcast out of equipment he put in my head to the systemic rape he uses to try and make me lose my mind. I cannot wait for his bubble around America to burst, so the American public can at last freely discuss the truth. What are you waiting for, America? Why aren’t you discussing it now while I am safely locked overseas and unable to hear it?

His fake support of me while broadcasting me against my will and initially without my knowledge in the privacy of my own home is disgusting. If I see one more bowl of apples in the foreground of a photo of him, I will not stop until he is imprisoned for all he has done to me. Okay, I already will not stop, but do not be fooled by him pretending to support what I stand for now. He is desperate to look like he did something worthwhile during his time in office, and he has always stolen from me. Now, he steals my ideas point blank.

If this continues after I get back to the States, I will rain fire on him and all that promote him. And we all know I can… even literally, if I have to.

In other thoughts than justice…

I have been finishing off a book by Jasper Fforde lately. The British have not yet complained that they hear so much Fforde coming through their earchips. I told them to get the chips removed, but we all know how little the British care to listen to my advice. Well, I have been finishing off this book, and it has made me wish I actually finished writing something last year. I had no chance, of course, with everything that passed my computer screen made common knowledge.

In 2007, I wrote the first version of “Infamy.” In 2008, I wrote the pilot episode to “CALIX, set sail!” In 2009, I finished nothing. This year has similarly proved to be mostly a dry spell, but lately I have been typing up a storm on this little Acer Aspire One. Who knows what I can get written by the time the countdown ends on New Year’s Eve.

Speaking of which, what are you all up to for New Year’s Eve. I have long considered it a more romantic night than Valentine’s Day. It does, after all, set up the tone of your entire year to come. Will I finally be allowed near my own husband? That Obama… He is such a criminal.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Four to Six Weeks

Through the joys of my webcam, here I am waving hello at my darling husband, the Mr. Johnny Depp a.k.a. my Mr. Love-of-my-Life wherever he may be right now.  Sweetness, I cannot wait to see you wave back.

It could take four to six weeks to get me home. I might miss Christmas. My quack-whore of a doctor, Dr. Helen Reynolds of Liverpool, UK, is still a major impediment to the process as well. Please, my beautiful world, keep the pressure on the British to treat me humanely and send me home as soon as possible. A better blog post is forthcoming.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The Quack is the Culprit, Again.

So, after a week of nothing happening, the hold-up in my exit process has been identified. It was, no surprise, my quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds. Now, things are underway. It is about damn time. Sometime soon, I will be sipping coffee and eating pizza with dear, old friends. I miss home as much as I miss traveling right now. I need a good, long flight to mellow me out. I always zen out when I am in transit.

The locals have been confusing. Some are actually friendly, now. Liverpool is finally starting to get its head out of its oversized backside on topics of me in my company. Just when I was about ready to bash heads in because the people here were constantly rude to me, they started to warm up. Huh, they are beginning to treat me like a human just in time for me to leave. It had to happen eventually. Let us hope the warmning trend continues.

Imaginary Daniel was just in town to see me. We celebrated his birthday and spent some long overdue time catching up. There is something addictive in good company; I absolutely did not want to let him go.

Today, I went to visit a couple of former patients of the Windsor House Quack Ward. Tomorrow, I am having coffee with a fellow inmate. Friday, I am seeing yet another former patient for some social time on the town. This has been a week of good, new friends... Let's hope we all stay in touch.

I now have eight hours a day to spend out and about off of the ward. Right now, I am at the public library typing these lines to the world and posterity. I am going to try to hunt up some live music this week. Liverpool is supposed to be known for its music, isn't it? Why is live music so hard to find, then? Wish me luck!

Sunday, November 7, 2010

You need to bother to make sense when you speak to me...

I am so tired of people attacking me and then complaining I don't like them because of it. Oh, and one more thing Brits, you just spent months choosing to fabricate lies about me; you don't get to attack me over not understanding the truth about me. You don't get to attack me over anything.

My beautiful world, stay strong and united. Your standing strong has helped me so much already. You will get this ended for me. I could never do this without you.

I am about to go from this hospital from hell in Liverpool to under my father's thumb in Iowa. Let's hope the Iowans treat me better than the Brits have been. I have faith. And, yes, my father, Thomas Raymond Varilek of Ankeny, Iowa, is still a monster and a terror to me.

They say it takes only one bad apple to spoil the whole batch. Well, one or two good apples are not enough to save a whole country. I had a wonderful time Friday night, but I was attacked by Liverpool locals last night in an onslaught of twatty verbal refuse. If it were not for the ocassional Brit actually behaving humanely towards me, I would be raining fire on this country by now. That said, I cannot wait to see 'Imaginary' Dan tomorrow. Yey! Yes, there are the ocassional good apples around here, but the bad ones are awful.

Brits, I am already your victim. You don't get to complain I don't like you if you keep treating me this way. Set me free of this hell.

Friday, November 5, 2010

My father, Thomas Raymond Varilek of Ankeny, Iowa, is evil.

My father just called me a few minutes ago for the first time in about six months. He had petitioned for adult guardainship of my while I was detained in hospital here in Liverpool, and it was egregiously granted to him by the Polk County District Court in Iowa despite the fact I am NOT an Iowa resident. Well, just a few minutes ago he called to rub my nose in the fact he owns me now.

On the upside, he finally has to be held responsible for all of the horrors he does to me while I am in his home. When last I lived there, I was raped in the house, and my father tried to burn the house down with me still inside of it. He put a camera of his own on me, and he chose to harm me himself instead of keeping me safe.

On the downside, he has laid claim to all of my money. There is not a whole lot of money since the US government denies me all employment while I am in the States for illegal reasons. Don't you remember this blog post? But, my dad, Thomas Raymond Varilek of Ankeny, Iowa, is using it to control me. He is evil and must be stopped.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

The Social Solution

It is practically impossible to find a decent conversation in this town. Yet, just when I get desperate for witty repartee I am rescued by my dear, British friend ‘Imaginary’ Daniel. No, he is not actually imaginary, but he is so good with conversation that it sometimes feels as though my subconscious spat him out just for my own amusement. He is my social remedy for how unbearable this place can be. When in doubt, all I need is a decent conversation to keep my head where it needs to be. He and the internet are my social solutions.

Speaking of solutions, I hope all of you in the States went out and rocked the vote yesterday. Democracy in action is breathtaking to behold. The US government needs its ass kicked into line, and I think that is what you, the American public, have been up to. Let us hope it worked. Let us hope all of the candidates keep their campaign promises… and then some. Also, let us hope you have all preserved America's freedoms and rights for everyone and even made the States a safe place for me when I get back.

Thank you, my entire beautiful world, for standing strong and united. You have almost brought me out of this hell and back to the States. The quack, in her smarmy yet occasionally useful way, has decided to notify the International Organization for Migration that I am ‘fit to travel’ back. The quack is so dirty that I need to bathe after I speak with her. I will be going to Iowa first, but there is a lot of America and the world I need to see. Because I am not going directly to my husband’s arms by going to France, the UK is not redeemed, but as soon as I am no longer their victim, I can treat them as normal humans again. The quack is so corrupt that I am not going to count my chickens until I am home, but my beautiful world, you have stood by me and it has worked. Thank you. With every essence of my soul, thank you. Keep the pressure on until I am safely freed from this hell.

Why did I not post this yesterday when I got the news? I am so sorry this blog post did not come out sooner than today, but I had to finish a letter to my husband to tell him first. I put it in the mail drop first thing this morning after a venture out into the rain. I did go out to celebrate last night, though. I went to see ‘The Social Network.’

‘The Social Network’ reminded me of the interconnectedness of the human experience and of the importance of every single last one of us. Just one person can make such a difference, and we are a connected world of such individuals. As I said already, the internet is part of my social solution to making life bearable in this hell. Staying connected to my loved ones and my world is something I could not live without. The human experience is a connection of singular individuals. Thank you, again, my beautiful world.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

They are Beyond Despicable.

My quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, refused to come into work today in order to ensure I am not granted any more time than I already have off the ward. It is time to put extra pressure on her to send me home. She obviously feels no pressure as things are now to do the right thing. She is refusing to follow any normal procedures, least of all any normal procedures to send me back to the States. I need you all to put enough pressure on her to release me as soon as possible. Thank you, world, for doing this for me.

My email account still has the British-gov-virus. I just received a fake email from my good, dear friend Cuddlebunny. It was a worse than pathetic attempt to pretend to be him.

Thank you, my beautiful world, for standing strong and united in support of me. If you do not mind just kicking the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, hard enough she finally does the right thing, I would greatly appreciate it. Her refusal to be in to make sure I cannot be released in a timely manner is disgusting. Put pressure on her she can actually feel.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

The Quack is still Quacking...!

My quack thinks it is a symptom that I call this a torture facility. Does anyone else remember this post? She also calls it a symptom that I hate her. The quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, needs to be kicked into line... and kicked hard.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Another Day in the Life

Aid for Gaza

Let’s hope the aid reaches its intended destination. Let’s hope the suffering becomes eased. Let us all hope that some change is made for the better in this situation. Always do everything you can to end the human suffering first, and then talk out how to prevent it from happening again afterwards.

Keeping the Area Stable

Do not let false accusations tear stability apart. If the Middle East goes to war with itself so much is lost. I know that the Middle East is very aware of this. I know that no one there wants to be a pawn for the West that starts World War 3. I know the Middle East listens to me. I know they will not be the ones to attack anyone first. For this I am hugely grateful... as is all the world.

Russia’s Fashion Week

Fashion is art, and art is culture. Fashion is a necessary form of human expression. Our expressions of ourselves begin with what we wear. We are noticed and recognized from our appearance before people can hear or witness our witty repartee. Human expression is the jewel of the human experience. Without art, we are nothing.

The Exchange Rate

The Chinese listened to me. In order to prevent global economic collapse, they kept their economy strong. It is time to ask a very important questions again, “Has Obama done anything but make the US worse?”

For example, I am a big deal. US decisions about me come straight from the top. Obama sent the executive orders to enslave me, torture me, rape me, broadcast me, sell me, and lie to me to make sure I could never find a way to stop it.

As another example, Obama has intentionally only bludgeoned the economy into almost non-existence. What has he done? And what effect did it have? That is what you need to look at. Do we think a MANDATORY universal health care plan that the lower AND middle income families (at least 80% of the country) cannot afford (especially after paying the taxes to build the system) will help or hurt the economy? Did he bail out the American public or did he bail out the wealthy? Did Obama do ANYTHING effective to fix the spill in the Gulf in a timely manner, or did he just lie and say the oil evaporated? I could ask these questions all night.

Clearly, China and the Middle East take me to heart and follow my advice while Obama is just a poser and wannabe. Obama was the first identified sperm whale and natural enemy of the giant Squid. I cannot believe he has not been impeached, yet. It is not long before his fascism has him disowned by the Democratic Party to save itself.

Multiculturalism Debate

The multiculturalism debate is a touchy one. I am a firm believer, though, that any excuse to learn a new language is a good one. I cannot imagine living immersed in a culture without wanting to learn its language. The language classes should be free, of course, and easily accessible.

If immigrants learn the new language, they will be better able to share their own culture with their new nation. They will better be able to be active members of their country and to be active in their government. I am a firm believer in breaking down all walls of ostracization.

WikiLeaks's Reputation

There is a new form of social justice. It comes from taking information and putting it in the public eye. This is a form of justice the common people have needed for a very long time. WikiLeaks has endangered no one but the corrupt, and this is clearly how the corrupt are fighting back... with slander and lies. The corrupt use it on me, and they now use it on WikiLeaks. WikiLeaks has hurt no informers. Stop falling for the lies.

Friday, October 15, 2010

More Radom Things on my Mind...

I often read my horoscope for amusement. I frequently find it has very little to do with my life, but my horoscope for the day today urged me to embrace my inner rebel. Voila! I knew my horoscope would hit home eventually! I am supposed to embrace my inner rebel in order to push the envelope and take a risk. Okay, maybe it was a better fit for yesterday. I think I am making real progress convincing my doctor to set me free. I could never do it without you, world. Keep the pressure on the quack, and I will get out of here, yet.

I know I need a haircut. I promised my cut hair to religious institutions, though. This will likely be easier to organize if I wait until I am State-side before getting the haircut, then. It is no real surprise what I will do. I need a trim of about 10 inches off the tips. As is usual, it might be hard to notice any difference.

I had an absolutely delightful afternoon today off of the ward. They let me out, now, for two hours a day in any denomination I so choose. I went down to a local tea and coffee shop to write a letter to my husband. I drank much tasty coffee there and even started and finished a poem for him. It was a delightful afternoon.

I received many wonderful birthday wishes this year both digitally and on paper. My cards and gifts from my sisters arrived already, but my card from my mom is still waiting somewhere to arrive. It seems to be another case of missing mail.

With communication on the mind, I recently sent an email to my attorney at home in San Francisco. I have not yet received a reply, so I am hoping he received it. Communication is always so speculative for me.

Speaking of communication problems, all comments for this blog must be approved by me first. I rarely if ever receive any comments for approval in my inbox… but lately some guy named Chad who is pretending he has met me before has been swamping my inbox. I wish he would stop. The only Chad I can think of from my past would not dare say one word to me now, so I do not even read the comments. I just delete them. Chad, if you are reading this, cease and desist. I do not know who you are and do not appreciate your false attention.

And now, from the news!

Freedom must feel so sweet.
All thirty-three of the miners are out! YEY! The people of the world heaved a sigh of relief and then began to party when the Earth finally spat them up. I hope they and their rescuers go on to live beautiful and successful lives.

Where do I begin?
Government-run and -instigated cyberbullying hand-in-hand with cyberslandering has long been the bane of my existence. I said it before and I will say it again, the internet has been my battleground for the truth. I am done with being a victim. You, my beautiful world, have come alive to save me. Thank you for everything.

The world goes on.
The sun still rises. The sun still sets. The world still turns, and the stars continue to metaphorically float across the aether. The world is not over yet. Let’s all see what we can do to keep humanity alive. Has anyone taken a good look at the ocean gyres lately? Take a look and get back to me on how to fix this. Thank you, my beautiful world.

Monday, October 11, 2010

The Post for the Day Before my Birthday

Properly placed diplomacy fuels economies instead of deadening them and serves the people’s needs. The US and the UK have a whole hell of a lot to learn. You see, properly placed diplomacy also does not involve sending missiles to hit a supposed ally. That giant hole in the ground in Chicago is there because the British government wanted to end all of humanity instead of face justice for what they have already done to me. I am sorry I let one through to hit Chicago. I still weep over that. Just ask the astronauts from any country who witnessed it all.

Support for an economy can come from any of all sorts of place. These places include sporting events like the French Open, the World Cup, or (for once, a sporting event I am not too quackery-drugged to miss all of) the Commonwealth Games. Oh, did they not tell you that the quack kept me too uselessly drugged to watch the World Cup? I am still angry about that. Yes, well, help for economies can come from all sorts of places. I hear a pirate movie is filming in London. We do everything we can. What do the British do to support us? Anything? 

I am still a victim of the British. I am only one woman; I cannot do everything. I cannot take care of the British while I am still their victim. The British need to stand up and demand I be set free of this hell. Until then, they live without any help from me... I just cannot do it. Stand up, Brits, stand up already!

Someone needs to cut Pakistan some slack. Not only have they dealt with flood, famine, and drone attacks from the US. Now, they just had an earthquake. Yes, I have taken it up with Mother Nature, but we strictly do not discuss earthquakes. Besides, we have had red sludge in Hungary as a hot topic lately. What would be best is if the US government would behave itself and only send troops to places they will NOT die in vain. That is not a real conflict. It is an invented one; that is why it is hopeless to win, just like Afghanistan.

Okay, fine, I admitted it. I can talk to Mother Nature, but I cannot speak to those in the afterlife. Let me dispel that myth about my abilities right now. There have been a wave of entertainment industry deaths lately, and as much as I would like to speak with Tony Curtis, it does not lie in my list of skills to communicate across the aether into the Underworld. I do not see ghosts. Or, if I do, I cannot tell that they are ghosts. I have many superhuman skills. That is not one of them.

Religion is a very important thing. It not only helps humanity make sense out confusing topics like the afterlife, the universe, and life, but it also is source of services for the community. I know that is a strange thing for a proud atheist such as myself to say, but it is what I believe. A great deal of good for the public from prisoner negotiations to soup kitchens come from religious institutions. I just have faith in a different higher power. I put my faith in humanity.  Stay strong and united, my beautiful world, and you will help me finally reach my human rights.

I also have faith my mail will eventually arrive. Tomorrow is my 33rd birthday, and I am expecting cards and packages from my mom and sisters. One package from my mother already went missing. Apparently, someone stole the external CD/DVD RW drive I bought for myself with the meager funds I am allowed during this whole debacle. My mom mailed it to me, and it never arrived. Let’s all make sure my birthday cards get here intact.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Another week as the quack's experiment...

My mom has not yet sent the letter. I am beginning to feel abandoned. I spend every day waiting for freedom from this rape house. I spend every day tethered to this torture facility waiting for my mother to set me free. I spend every day looking for a faster option. There is only one other option I have found. The British could kick my quack into line finally and demand she set me free.

The quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, thinks I am a toy for her amusement. Not only am I her walking, tortured chemistry experiment (What will they inject me with this week?), but I now am a social experiment as well. She is now “allowing” me to go out twice a day for ½ an hour at a time each. It takes fifteen minutes to walk anywhere, and if I pass someone along the way I would like to have a conversation with, I CANNOT take the two ½-hour sessions in a row. I am allowed out, but I am not allowed to do anything nor to speak to anyone.

She claims it is a test. Yes, I know what kind of tests quacks do. At its best, it is a tease. I get ½ an hour twice a day to walk around the block because there is no way to do anything else. What is there to learn about me from this? That I know how to tell time? Quack. That is all Dr. Helen Reynolds is. She is a quack, and I am her tortured, rape-victim experiment.

The International Organization for Migration (IOM), on the other hand, has proven to be angels. On absolutely no notice, Steve and Lydia made sure I could update my paperwork with them to make sure I can still travel home once I am set free of this place. They really took care of me.

France, yes, I will see you as soon as it is guaranteed my husband and I are allowed to be together. He might want a detour through the Caribbean, but I will be there as soon as possible. My husband can have anything he wants, as far as I am concerned. I am sure you understand.

Monday, October 4, 2010

I will Travel to see you, my Passionate World.

I have heard the travel warnings for Americans wanting to go to Europe. The warnings concern terrorist attack threats by extremists at major landmarks. I, for one, do not allow anything to control my normal way of life without a fight. If we allow terrorist threats to stop us from leading our normal lives, the terrorists win; we are terrorized. Yes, people should proceed with care, but we cannot allow them to take away our normal ways of life. That gives the terrorists everything they want without having to lift a finger. If you are a normal traveller or vacationer to Europe, I say, “Go ahead and travel.” Otherwise, we have already lost our way of life to the extremists.

Some people claim I am a victim of the internet. Others say I am an internet giant. It is very true that my relationship with the internet has been strange, but who would I be without it? The internet has been my battleground for the truth, and it has been a showcase for what technology is capable of now. The public has learned to keep track of where they learned what. People now know to stick to only reliable places for truth and insight. The world has learned to take care, to stand strong, and make its voice heard.

I could still use some help with the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds. I could use a strong world to kick her into line. She is not only the reason the British have not been allowed to redeem themselves by sending me to France to be with my husband, but she also has a Napoleon complex. Dr. Helen Reynolds stands maybe five feet tall and has pronounced control issues. It is clear that the only reason she is refusing to discharge me from this hospital’s (total lack of) care is only because I insist on it. I could use the world putting pressure on her to do the right thing.

World, I will see you after I go to Iowa. I promised my mother that if she sent the letter demanding my freedom BEFORE the hospital’s office closes this Thursday, October 7th, 2010, then I would go straight to Iowa to be with her. She needs some care and attention, and it is the least I can do for her as a thank you. It is clear the British are doing nothing to save themselves right now. I meet with my quack tomorrow, and all she will do is make my angry at being left in here still. My mother will fix the problem, but the quack will still need to sign the papers. And, yes, France, I will go see you after I check on my mom in Iowa.

Britain, stop overthinking all of this. I need to no longer be your victim before I can take care of you again... just as I care for all the world. I am doing everything in my power to no longer be your victim. What are YOU doing? Are you doing ANYTHING. Okay, you REFUSE to redeem yourselves; at least, I will be able to treat you like everyone else, again, once I get to Iowa. You'll just be unredeemed. Try helping my mother get me out of here.

Speaking of my mother, she birthed me almost thirty-three years ago. I was born on October 12th, 1977. That means that I will be celebrating my 33rd birthday a week from tomorrow. YEY! I wonder what the world will bring me as a gift. Will it be my freedom from this hell? I do not care about any of those terrorist threats. I WILL go see you, World. I just need a way out of this hell they call a hospital.

Friday, October 1, 2010

And now... some Narcissism!

It has been one more day waiting for the letter from my mom to arrive. The good news is that letter from my angelic mother is on its way. It should be here soon. Freedom, here I come!!!

The quack is still quacking... and loudly. I still have no leave. I am still tortured by nurses with needles. I am still confined to this hell they pretend is a hospital. People keep asking me if I would be willing to stay in Liverpool. Those people must be crazy, pardon the joke. I have been more poorly treated here than anywhere else. It has reached the point that the nurses’ accent on ANY human can make me cringe in pain. We will see how long it takes me to heal from that.

Yesterday was torture day. They came after me with needles. I screamed in anguish. I cannot wait until I am released from this torture facility.

I am now going to use world news to talk about myself… Please pardon my momentary narcissism.

1.) Visions of America
The long-term vision of America by the Obama administration has long been the total ruin of the country. Have they changed, yet? It appears not. Their policies on me included but were not limited to raping me until I killed myself. They have yet to display a long-term vision based on saving America, helping America, or allowing America to grow, thrive, and flourish. On the upside, I received a job listing in my email inbox recently from a company in San Francisco, and Iowa is acknowledging my marriage. It seems the country is on the mend on topics of me. Let’s see how far the people can heal the nation.

2.) Government Collapse Averted
It seems a faction of politicians saved Italy from government collapse. Collapse is an awful thing… so is a gap of power. Do you remember what it was like when they pretended I was dead? ‘Who listens to Obama in the first place?’ was my first reaction to the issue, but people kept believing him. There are still British who think I was somehow switched for another me. There is no other me. I am only one woman. There were just a slew of women out to slander my name. Let’s see if the world can convince the British of the truth.

3.) I am not scared to show I am vulnerable.
Okay, I was more attracted to this story due to its title. I am very vulnerable. It is easy to hurt me. Yes, I survive it all, but that does not mean people don’t hurt me in the first place. Take the nurses here, for example; they do nothing but abuse me. It is okay to show where we are vulnerable. That is a true show of strength. I have a theory that people are at their strongest when their vulnerabilities are allowed to show. I am not one for false shows of bravado. Now, that is a sign of weakness.

4.) Rwanda
There are so many things I have been wishing I could have helped with by now, if only I were not in here being abused by the nurses. There are so many enduring world problems I was hoping to get my brain around and into. Just think of everything I am capable of; now, think of what I could do if I had human rights... ANY human rights. I am here. Give me my human rights, and see what I can do!

5.) Home to Tokyo
Ah, a homecoming... Que the U2 song! Soon, I will be going to Iowa to help take care of the Midwest. There is a lot of world I need to see. I am starting where my mother lives.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Remove the Quack

I am almost ready to give up on the British entirely. How long have I been here? I have been in this country since March 8th, 2010, and I have yet to see the British stand up for me. I have been abandoned by the British public in this hospital to be RAPED and abused since May 19th, 2010. The British have NOT stood up nor done anything to get me out, yet. How much time did they need? It is almost too late for them. The British are refusing to save themselves.

I am still subjected to the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds. Remove her from being my doctor, replace her with someone willing to discharge me from this hospital, and the situation will greatly improve. She is a quack, and that vile, power-corrupted quack needs to be put in her place. She is standing in the way of the British people redeeming themselves.

Yesterday, I was subjected to the horrors of the quack. Today, this afternoon I will face down my power-hungry father. Tomorrow is injection torture day. Stop the quack, replace her with a doctor willing to discharge me from this hospital, and send me to my husband in France. Then, and only then, will the British have finally redeemed themselves.

I cannot protect the British while I am still their victim. The British need to bother to do something. They need to bother to do what is right.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

To Clear up any Confusion...

Cosmonauts and an astronaut have returned from the international space station MIR. I wonder what sorts of stories they can tell about watching us mere mortals back on Earth from outer space. They must have wonderful, colorful, explosive stories about the things they have witnessed. I hope we all get to hear their stories together someday. They have witnessed things I am not allowed to hear about.

It sounds like Spain and Basque are giving peace a chance. I knew the world would listen to me someday. There are better ways to resolve conflicts than with a drawn gun. Odd comment, I know, for a woman who has authorized the entire world to use ‘whatever force necessary’ to rescue her from this torture facility. It is just clear that if I am still in here, diplomacy has failed. Sigh... but I can only assume that there are other things you are all trying to peacefully rescue me since no one with a drawn gun has yet shown up to get me out of this hell. Please hurry. I am holding onto my sanity as best I can in here. They do not make it easy to keep a clear head. Thank you for giving peace a chance, Basque. Thank you.

China is still developing better human rights for all of its citizens. The white paper is out about its improvements from 2009. The world is a beautiful place indeed. I wonder how long it will take for me to finally have my human rights reinstated… Thank you, China. I always knew you read and listened.

Now, to clear up any confusion on the topic… Because the British do not recognize my marriage to the Mr. Johnny Depp a.k.a. my Mr. Love–of-my-Life, my mother is who they consider my nearest family member. This is because my mom is the older of my two parents. So, it is possible for my mom to demand that the NHS finally set me free of this hell they pretend is a hospital.

If my mom breaks me out of here, I will go to Iowa to help take care of her. She lives with my overbearing father still. However, the British can only redeem themselves if they break me out of here themselves and send me to France to live with my husband. With the new leadership of the Labour Party, my hopes are high that this might happen. Yes, I prefer that the British redeem themselves. No matter what, I need to get out of this hell they pretend is a hospital.

Ed Miliband, let’s hope changes around here are changes for the better. I am only one woman. I cannot continue taking care of the British people while I am still your victim. I am just not capable of it any longer. Start correcting wrongs done and still continuing to be done by the current government, and you will see the British redeemed. You are on a clock, though. You only have until my mom breaks me out of here herself.

My beautiful world, thank you for everything, and please keep the pressure on lonely, tiny England. This will work. You will bring me to freedom and my full human rights eventually. Thank you.

P.S. My mother mailed me a package that should have arrived this last Friday at the latest. Whoever has it, please make sure it is finally delivered. My poor mother has enough on her mind.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Oh, My Beautiful World!

Oh, my beautiful world, I have faith you will break me free of this place. I need faith in something, and my faith is in you. It is in all of you.

I remember what it was once like to have freedom. Never let anyone do to you what has been done to me. I have been ruined in here.

I never used to become angry. I have never had this bad a temper. I never used to hate. Now, because of my time in this hell they pretend is a hospital, I am guilty of all three. I need to freed of this place, so I can heal. I know I can heal. I just need the chance. Please, my beautiful world, stand strong, and break me out of this quack ward.

I remember how beautiful the world is. I am crying as I type this. I remember what it is like to see a horizon. I remember what it is like to have freedom. I remember my human rights. Please, my beautiful world, help me.

There is so much more I have left to do in this world. Please don’t let them kill me in here. My quack is a monster. I have been her chemistry experiment for four months, now. Please stop her, and please insist I be set free.

Thank you, my beautiful world, for everything you have already done for me. Please stay strong, passionate, and united. You are the only thing that can set me free from here and send me to my full human rights. Please, my beautiful world. Please.

Please Stop my Quack and Stop my Father. I Need your Help.

I need your help.

The wrongs of the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, against me I detailed in my last post... But, to reiterate. The quack 1.) does not allow me out of this building at all, 2.) refuses to admit that I am ‘fit to travel,’ 3.) mandates that I be held down, battered, injected, and tortured with chemicals, 4.) lies about me to get away with all of this, and 5.) rejects any attempt made on my behalf to have me discharged from this quack ward. The quack must be stopped. Please spread around what she looks like. Justice needs to come from somewhere, and the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, must be stopped.

As for my father, he does not want me in control of my own life, surroundings, or money. He does not want me to live in a safe environment. He wants me confined to THAT HOUSE with him. When last I lived in that house, a rape kit found live sperm in my urethra. He was one of the perpetrators even beyond refusing to keep me safe while I lived in that house. He had a camera of his own on me in my bedroom, as well. That is the life my father is laboring that I return to.

Beyond being despicable, he is also driven by lies about me. A typical conversation between me and my dad sounds like this,...

DAD (angry): How dare you do that!
ME (bewildered): How dare I do what, dad?
DAD: You know!!!
ME: No, dad, I don’t know. What are you talking about?
ME: Dad, what the hell are you talking about?
DAD: Why are you lying to me!?!
ME: I am not a liar. If you ask me an honest question, I will give you an honest answer.

And then he gets angry and gets off the phone with me. Clearly, he is driven by the lies about me that I am not allowed to ever hear. My father must be stopped.

His insistence on having guardianship of me, a married, French, almost thirty-three year-old, is beyond disgusting. It is also a further human rights violation against me. It is designed to make sure I cannot live in safe surroundings with control of my own belongings, money, and life.

The official hearing concerning permanent guardianship over me will occur at the Polk County Courthouse in Des Moines, IA this Wednesday, September 19th, 2010. I would greatly appreciate any support Iowa or surrounding people can lend to my cause. I cannot be there myself because of the quack.

The quack must be stopped. Again, she 1.) does not allow me out of this building at all, 2.) refuses to admit that I am ‘fit to travel,’ 3.) mandates that I be held down, battered, injected, and tortured with chemicals, 4.) lies about me to get away with all of this, and 5.) rejects any attempt made on my behalf to have me discharged from this quack ward. The quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, must be stopped.

All things considered, especially considering recent events, if I were given the chance, I would rather live with my husband in France. If this requires my mother to spring me out of this hell, though, I will go to Iowa. My parents need a dose of reality. My father needs to be put in his place. My mother needs to be saved from him. If you have the ability to convince my mother to write a letter to spring me out of this hell they pretend is a hospital, I would appreciate your help with that as well. Thank you.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

What the Lack of Opportunity for Exercise has Done to my Body…

After four months stuck in this building with no chance for exercise and with my body as the quack’s chemistry experiment, I am now squooshy and round. I might be hard to recognize when I get out finally. I am not used to being this squooshy at all.

The lack of exercise--mixed with the quack’s (Dr. Helen Reynold’s) refusal to allow me out of the building and mixed with the nurses holding me down and battering and bruising me to stick my full of chemicals with long pointed needles--has been giving me symptoms of depression. I sleep so much more than I used to.  I am losing my appetite.  I am losing an interest in life as a whole.  So much could be fixed if I could just get some exercise.

Well, okay, so much more could be fixed if the quack, Dr, Helen Reynolds, were finally stopped. I can only imagine what lies she tells to pretend I could be made well by being locked into this building with no chance to go outside with people who abuse me and stick me full of needles. The quack must be stopped. If you know what she looks like, do all you can to stop her. This has reached crisis level.

The quack is also the person who stands in the way of my being released from this hell. Should that all of you do what you can to stop her, finally (and I know by the fact I am still stuck in this hellhole that the British have yet to get off their asses and redeem themselves), I might choose to go to Iowa to keep my mother safe,… but I still prefer France.  I have been denied the arms of my loving (and long-forgiven) husband by the quack, Dr. Helen Reynolds, for far too long.

Please, world, keep all of the pressure you can on those that wrong me. Make the British break me out. Haul in the quack who is my torturer. Please, world, deliver me to someplace I get to have my full human rights, for once. My surroundings have been out of my control for far too long. I need safety.

Also, please thank the President of Iran for the wonderful speech to the UN General Assembly. I always knew Iran listened to me. I never knew just how much they took me to heart until now. Please give the President a BIG thank you for me.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

The Current Writing Projects I have been Dabbling In...

With the arrival of this new little computer in my life, I now have the ability to write again. My current WIP list is the same as always, though. I suppose I need privacy before I can finish anything.

I am still working through my screenplay “Latent City.” The main characters have almost all met each other, now. With any luck, I can make a real dent before I reach plot points that mandate privacy for my writing.

The short story I started in Iowa over a year ago with the expressed purpose of confusing anyone reading my writing against my will, “Whiskeyless Fictions,” is coming along as well. It is still a masterwork of just-close-enough-to-real-while-just-far-enough-from-true to confuse every mislead soul who wants to psychoanalyze it. I love the project more and more every time I pick it up.

Who Knew The Adventuress may or may not get a question mark at the end of the title. I have also just taken a dive at the second book. I do not want to go much further at all on my novel, though, without decided copyright protection and privacy for it.

Those are my big three right now. I still have a lot of work ahead of me on my Children’s fiction project and Young Adult fiction project, but I have been putting off laying finger to keyboard on those two. The cookbook is waiting on some sister collaboration still, and … okay… EVERYTHING is waiting until I can have intellectual privacy, at last. Maybe someday I will have the freedom to finish writing any of them.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Torture Day

I titled this post as if every day in here were not replete with torture and its potential. Today, though, was injection torture day. I scream because it makes death crawl through my body. I scream because they batter and bruise me. I scream because it is all I can do. Yes, they still lie to get away with it. Yes, they still try to hide that they do it. Yes, they lie to pretend it is not inhumane.

They are torturers, and they know they are guilty. I need every last torturer held accountable. They need to be hauled in for justice. With my rapists still working on the night shift, though, I doubt there is any justice anywhere on this island. Ask yourselves: when was the last time I was in control of my environment? It was before May 2009. Isn’t it time I finally have safety?

I am only human. I simply cannot care for the British while I am their victim any longer. I have done everything conceivable to take care of these people, and all they do is keep victimizing me. I cannot go on this way. The British have to get off their asses and bother to do something, now. Please, world, put the pressure on them to redeem themselves at last. Until they do, I cannot take care of them any longer. The British are on their own without my care or support until I am out of this hell they pretend is a hospital and in my husband’s arms in France with my full human rights. The British have to fend for themselves without me until that happens. Let us hope they redeem themselves at last by sending me home to France.

Also, remember my father cannot be trusted under any circumstances.

This is posted with very little proofreading.