To Clear up any Confusion...

Cosmonauts and an astronaut have returned from the international space station MIR. I wonder what sorts of stories they can tell about watching us mere mortals back on Earth from outer space. They must have wonderful, colorful, explosive stories about the things they have witnessed. I hope we all get to hear their stories together someday. They have witnessed things I am not allowed to hear about.

It sounds like Spain and Basque are giving peace a chance. I knew the world would listen to me someday. There are better ways to resolve conflicts than with a drawn gun. Odd comment, I know, for a woman who has authorized the entire world to use ‘whatever force necessary’ to rescue her from this torture facility. It is just clear that if I am still in here, diplomacy has failed. Sigh... but I can only assume that there are other things you are all trying to peacefully rescue me since no one with a drawn gun has yet shown up to get me out of this hell. Please hurry. I am holding onto my sanity as best I can in here. They do not make it easy to keep a clear head. Thank you for giving peace a chance, Basque. Thank you.

China is still developing better human rights for all of its citizens. The white paper is out about its improvements from 2009. The world is a beautiful place indeed. I wonder how long it will take for me to finally have my human rights reinstated… Thank you, China. I always knew you read and listened.

Now, to clear up any confusion on the topic… Because the British do not recognize my marriage to the Mr. Johnny Depp a.k.a. my Mr. Love–of-my-Life, my mother is who they consider my nearest family member. This is because my mom is the older of my two parents. So, it is possible for my mom to demand that the NHS finally set me free of this hell they pretend is a hospital.

If my mom breaks me out of here, I will go to Iowa to help take care of her. She lives with my overbearing father still. However, the British can only redeem themselves if they break me out of here themselves and send me to France to live with my husband. With the new leadership of the Labour Party, my hopes are high that this might happen. Yes, I prefer that the British redeem themselves. No matter what, I need to get out of this hell they pretend is a hospital.


Ed Miliband, let’s hope changes around here are changes for the better. I am only one woman. I cannot continue taking care of the British people while I am still your victim. I am just not capable of it any longer. Start correcting wrongs done and still continuing to be done by the current government, and you will see the British redeemed. You are on a clock, though. You only have until my mom breaks me out of here herself.

My beautiful world, thank you for everything, and please keep the pressure on lonely, tiny England. This will work. You will bring me to freedom and my full human rights eventually. Thank you.

P.S. My mother mailed me a package that should have arrived this last Friday at the latest. Whoever has it, please make sure it is finally delivered. My poor mother has enough on her mind.