Just in case the medically recognized symptoms of schizophrenia have not yet been made public, I thought I would provide a link for you to find them here. Could you imagine having this disease since at least the summer of 1998 and then having to determine what is and is not real in a world where these things are happening to me for real after an international Code of Silence is dropped on me under which all of my friends are instructed to tell me "Squid, it's all in your head," when I ask them about all of the horrors committed against me that I have figured out through thought processes of my own. I have never been stupid (Pardon that gross understatement.), and thank goodness for that. But, sometimes somethings get past me when a great deal of money is spent by a corrupt government to make reality look like the symptoms the government already knew I have been living with and battling for over a decade.
I have a theory that my battle with my own mind for survival makes battling the government for survival look so easy no one wants to believe "Squid vs. a subset of the US executive branch" is real. Could you imagine being caught in a battle of wits with MY mind. I am lucky I survived fighting my own mind all those years ago to discover ways to effectively treat my disease. I do not recommend anyone else taking on a fight against my brain and its capabilties. Then again, the government has made it abundantly obvious they never take my advice, anyway.
Our government's justifications to the public for wanting me dead? Yeah, I would really like to hear those. That may be one of the main reasons I am not allowed to hear the real news. (And no one can tell me that they have not noticed my dedicated broadcasts are accuracy-free.) I am the one most likely able to point out every way in which our government lies. I am the one who has had to live through every method through which they have tried to kill me. I also know who almost all of the people are who will come forward with the truths they know about these things once they are no longer intentionally terrorized by our government to keep quiet. Besides, the government cannot seem to keep its story straight on topics of me. That is one sure sign that it is doing nothing but lie a new lie to cover up an old one that was told to cover up another lie that was told to cover up a previous lie. Blah blah blah... Why is this still going on? Oh, wait, I am also not allowed to hear the lies they use to justify that either.
Oh, and while I am talking about this still going on... what was the justification, again, for why doctors are not allowed to treat me for real illnesses? We all know about the nanotechnology in my body. We all know that the Code of Silence was dropped on me (among many other reasons) to prevent me from ever figuring out that they were placed inside me. Now that I know they are real, why are doctors still forbidden to treat me? To remove the nanotechnology from my body? or to even treat the many ways I am not supposed to know that have already been using to try to kill me? Have I said here, yet, that I know who most of the people are that will come forward with the truth once they are no longer terrorized by our government into not telling the truth?
When I leave my home, I interact with people who listen to and obviously believe the government's lies. I do my best once I can figure out what the lies are to fix the situation with truth and sound logical reasoning, but I am the one who is operating under the Code of Silence, here. So, in an attempt to work backwards from way people treat me to what the government lied to the pubic about, here is a list of possible lies the government told and how you all should know that no one should have listened to such lies in the first place. Yes, I know that the government lied on many occasions already to force some sort of government patsy to kill me, harm me, hospitalize me, etc... so that the government would have someone else to hold responsible for all of it. No one has killed me, yet. Here are the first twenty lies I have a theory have been told about me that I can name off the top of my mind and the first reasons that come to mind why none of them are the truth:
1.) I am a foreign national.
I was born in the US. There is a legal record of that. My mother was there for it. Except for a moment of personal crisis when I sought political asylum at the British Embassy in Mexico last October, I have never wanted to be a citizen of another country. I thought it might prevent the US from falling apart if I were not living here as the government's victim. Clearly, no one thinks these things through the same way I do. Then again, with a Code of Silence on me, no one gets to ask me why I do what I do for my country, self, city, world, etc... I like to do things like quote the US Constitution at the government. I am super-damn-American that way.
2.) I am an illegal foreign national.
I am pretty sure that the US government that knows so very clearly that I am here would have had me deported by now if I were an illegal immigrant.
3.) It is okay to commit crimes against me because I am a foreign national.
Any breathing adult human within the boundaries of the United States of America is due the protection of the US government at every level from any known crime committed against or to be openly committed against that person.
4.) It is okay to commit crimes against me because I am an illegal foreign national.
Please see argument against lie #3 above, and please also remember basic human rights as defined by the United Nations apply to more countries that just those that are members of the United Nations.
5.) (This one is from government voices pumped into my head not from the public believing lies from the government.) I was once a prostitute by choice to make ends meet.
If I were, I would have had to have be paid for it in order for it to fit the legal old-school definition of prostitution. Then again, I am pretty sure I would have remembered if I had ever done it, anyway. Hmmmm... this might end up as the only "Squid says. Government says." moment on this list. However, for the government to believe I was ever once a prostitute, there would have to be some sort of legal record of my being arrested for it. Otherwise, how would a local issue such as prostitution have reached the ears of the federal government in the first place?
6.) Allowing the government to force me into prostituting myself for the first time would have ended this.
Well, let's think about this one. Where do I begin? There are so many things to say about this particular lie. I doubt I will actually list all of my arguments for this one here....
Forced prostitution is a war crime. Forcing a woman to prostitute herself to end other atrocities be they against herself or others is still a war crime. If we are not at war when it happens, it is a crime against humanity. Then again, that might be a legality the government did not consider.
Raping a woman and making money off of it is forced prostitution, too; even if the woman is not allowed to ever obtain any money for it herself. Other forms of prostitution, and I am no legal expert on these things seeing as I have never been a prostitute by choice most likely include, making money off a woman's forced public nudity, making money off a woman's forced pubic humiliation through forced pubic nudity, and any other ways of making money off of publicly sexualizing a woman against her will. So, if the government actually honestly meant that if I were to be forced into prostituting myself by them all on my own to end this, they did not realize they were already prostituting me, and it should have already ended if that were not a lie to begin with.
As the last point I am listing on this one (though there are more), finally and openly becoming a prostitute under the old-school definition of such would not be retroactive. It would not be able to make me a prostitute in my past. It would not be able to create a fictional past under which past atrocities committed against me could suddenly be justified. Please see the argument I am about to write for the next lie on this list.
7.) It is okay to rape a prostitute.
A prostitute is still a full adult human due all of the basic human rights due to any full adult human... no matter where that prostitute lives... no matter if that prostitute is an illegal immigrant. For further clarification of this, please see the United Nations ICTY (International Criminal Court) Rule of Operation #96.
8.) It is okay to rape a prostitute in full knowledge of the public.
It is not okay to rape ANYBODY. If it is in full knowledge of the public, let's say, in the form of an enema, then it is a sure sign of the failure of the government all of the way from DC to local police if it actually happens. It is also a sure sign that the American public needs to get its morality reviewed for just rolling over and allowing it to happen.
If this country fails completely, it fails completely at every level. "We the people..." means exactly that. The government should not be the one controlling us. We are the ones who meant to be controlling our government.
9.) I believe I have superpowers.
If by superpowers the government meant I am intelligent, self-educated, and know how to use my library card, then I might actually go along with this one as real. As for anything else, I have no idea what they might be talking about. It's not like I can walk on water or something. I know I can't. I can speak the truth in a vacuum, though. But that is something any one of us can do if we do not allow our government to terrorize us into not telling the truth.
10.) I believe I am Jesus.
I am an atheist that people like to tell is Buddhist. Then again, part of Christian dogma is believing that God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit... blah, blah, blah,... is in each and every one of us. It could be one of those it's-all-the-same things... I am a firm believer that all benevolent religions are fair game for finding spiritual guidance. I wish I had more time to study more of them, but I have been a little busy lately actively not dying while trying to find a peaceful way to end all of this in time to get humanity through the Global Climate Change crisis. Besides, of all the symptoms of schizophrenia I have had (and I know that they have been well documented by the doctors actually allowed to treat me... yes, that means the doctors I saw before the Code of Silence dropped on me...), a Jesus Complex has never been one of them.
11.) I try to control the government.
I do not like controlling anybody but myself. I do not like being in situations where I have to tell other people what to do. However, if people ask me nicely for advice, I will dispense my best, educated guess on how to fix a problem. I will also, under the influence of my own personal driving force of social responsibility, speak up if I think the US government which is supposed to be controlled by its citizens needs to hear a voice of knowledgeable, logically-structured advice... especially if it is a case of physical safety for myself, my city, my country, my world, etc... At my most extreme, I like telling the members of the US government to go read the US Constitution to find their real job descriptions. For anything else, our government is going to have to manifest the civility to sit down with me and ask me politely to my face for advice.
12.) I do not actually write the works that the government steals off of my hard drive that I never wanted in the public in the first place.
Okay, the claim that I do not write the things I actually place in the public on my own is its own thing. If someone wants credit for something I really did write all on my lonesome, I am the one person whom that accuser will have to look in the face and offer some sort of logically structured argument of how I stole from that writer.
As for claiming that I did not write the fictions or even non-fictions stolen off my hard drive that I never wanted made public, the first thing the accuser will have to do is admit to stealing them, then show me where in the public that person put them, and then tell me what lies that accuser said to get away with it. I am still waiting to hear any justification for any wrongs committed against me including lying about me. There is a reason defamation is illegal.
13.) I am married.
If I were married, I would know. In order for a marriage certificate to be legally binding it cannot be a.) forged, b.) signed against one's will, nor c.) signed by someone not of healthy mind at the time. This stands for all legal documents that require signatures. We also get to keep a copy of all legal documents we sign for a reason. As I said, if I were married, I would know.
14.) I have ever been married.
If I had ever been married, I would know. There would be a legal record not only of the marriage but also of the divorce. It would also mean that I would have found at some point in my past a man whom I thought would treat me well on a long-term basis.
I know many people have asked me why I do not have a tattoo. My response has always been, "I have a fear of commitment." I think I might be ready for my first tattoo, now.
15.) I have children.
If I ever endured the physical demands of childbirth, I think I would remember. Besides, there would be a record of such childbirths with the hospital in which such supposed children were born. Not to mention, there would be a record with my health insurance companies who would have had to foot the bills for the maternity care. Well, that and the fact I would have been there for it.
16.) I have ever been pregnant and told about it.
There is a fuzzy zone on someone possibly making me pregnant when I was violated repeatedly and quite against my will and drugged in an attempt to make me forget it while I was under in-patient care at the University of Minnesota-Fairview last May. By the way, forced birth control, forced pregnancy, and forced abortion are all other forms of war crimes that are also called crimes against humanity at times when we are not at war. However, if they forced me to become pregnant while I was there and then forced an abortion on my body, I would have had my period while I was in there. That hospital system knows other documented reasons why they did not successfully make me pregnant against my will including but no limited to my OB/GYN exam within their hospital system in late March as well as the methods through which they physically violated me.
17.) I am a drag queen.
What? How can you call me pregnant and a drag queen and expect anyone to believe a word you say about me afterward? Even after people born male undergo complete body surgery to become women, those women cannot have eggs with their genetic coding pop out of ovaries, travel down fallopian tubes, become embedded in the nutrient rich (due to monthly body cycles) walls of the uterus where it could become fertilized, and then after nine months on average of gestation exit the body through the vaginal canal. I have lived in this body my entire life. I know how my body parts are supposed to be working. Besides, if a person born male undergoes complete body surgery to become a woman, that woman is a woman and not a drag queen. The government is so lucky that one of the last things I would ever call defamation is being called a drag queen... unless that lie forced me to become physically attacked, harmed, violated, etc... That is one of the many reasons defamation is illegal.
18.) I am a witch.
Be it witch (lower case) or Witch (upper case), this one is also far from being an insult. I would also only call it defamation if it caused me to be physically attacked, harmed, violated, etc... As I said, though, I am an atheist... an atheist that people like to call a Buddhist. Look. What religion I might follow is my concern. As long as I am law-abiding, peaceful, socially-responsible, benevolent, and understanding, I have no idea why people need to know what religion(s) I might be studying at the moment.
19.) I have ever had plastic surgery.
What? Where do these ridiculous things come from? First of all, I have never been able to afford it. My health insurance only covers reconstructive surgery, and I have never been through a crisis that would have ever forced me use such coverage. Besides, have you seen my childhood photos? I look pretty much the same just taller and with a full-adult woman's figure, now.
I saw a photo of my mom while she was gestating me. She was thirty-one years old in that photo from my childhood photo album. I was, of course, thirty-one when I saw that photo; she looked just like me at that age just pregnant. My mom is the vain type who might someday get plastic surgery... she is a little worried about her arms just like all women are at her age. It's comforting for me to know I am aging just like my mother, just scaled up to the size of a Czech farm woman. (I get that from my dad's side of the family.) My mom looks just her mom used to, too. It runs in the family this way.
I know, I know, all you superficial types are jealous of the love of my life... blah blah blah... We are so much more than just what we look like. How many times do I have to say that?
20.) I am not a systemic rape victim of the US government.
Please see all arguments above. Lie #20 is proving itself to be a lie all on its own, and the longer this goes on the uglier this gets. It's not like I haven't tried stopping all of this on my own through what means you have left me. All I have is my freedom of speech right now, an ability not to be terrorized into not telling the truth, and my wits to get me by. As I said, though, the more and more people tell each other the truth instead of repeating lies from other sources, the less and less this government will be able to terrorize its people. I know that nobody gets to consult with me on how to end this because the bugs in my ears and cameras in my eyes go straight to the government oppressing us, but I am doing my best here to get the snowball rolling in the right direction to end this.
Well, there we go. There is my blog post du nuit. Did I get that right? I have never studied French... among many other language for which I have picked up a convincing accent when speaking what little vocabulary I have for that particular means of conversing. I mean, really, just because someone knows a few words in a language, it does not mean she is fluent. Speaking of which, have you heard how convincing my Russian accent is? If I knew any Russian beyond the basic polite phrases, I would be able to use it in situations other than saying funny phrases in English after drinking too much whiskey.
I have a silly habit of making up funny stories that are so ridiculous no one should believe them when I drink bourbon... most writers past, present, and future are often subject to this practice. I do not claim to tell the truth when I spout of those fictions, anyway. And when I do, if I say these things out loud, they are funny stories about myself and nothing that could be called a lie about some other person.
I cannot wait until I can finally get an accurate and unbiased test on my hair for any past drug usage. Let's see it what I post here tomorrow is any more cheery.