Saturday, August 17, 2013

Quick Update

Preface: Same as always... Make sure you favorite or bookmark, so you can check this blog regularly for new posts. Please read and share them all. Yes, yes, share all my blog posts yourselves!

Here is my latest blog post. Just a quick update.

Thursday night after my last blog post, the government still tried to murder my rescuers. I threw a fit a over this last night, Friday night, but the government successfully murdered rescuers last night anyway. I am furious, but I heard today that the government now has orders from the newest president (Another one got impeached. I have lost track of who is president.) to no longer kill my rescuers but allow them through instead. I will believe it when my rescuers show up.

My brave rescuers, stay safe out there. It is just a rumor I heard that you are safe to travel now, and I have not had it confirmed. Please just use your key if and when you show up. I will likely be asleep. But my mom and I baked you all fresh cookies today! Do you all like soft peanut butter, oatmeal, and chocolate chip cookies?

Clearly, my beautiful world, my rescuers are not here yet, but I keep hearing from all of you that you are worried about my being attacked by terrorists. Jared was always a better deterrent than a bodyguard, but he is in Chicago until Monday. (You can look for him tomorrow in the bleachers at the Cubs game.) Please, my beautiful world, keep an eye on me. Soon I will have bodyguards and a husband to keep me safe, until then I need you all to guard me.

Luckily, the countdown is on for the bubble to burst completely. I was told, and it was confirmed that I and America will all be free on Monday 19 August 2013. This new president really seems to know what he or she is doing. Everyone is apparently welcome. I am looking forward to the media circus. Buy your plane tickets now, my beautiful world!

Yesterday, Friday, I learned the witch hunt against me by Attorney General Holder continues. He tried pressing charges against me for always screaming for help for my rescuers when the government murders them. It was ruled that I am just acting in the best interests of innocent people trying to exercise their court upheld rights when I do it, and the charges were dismissed. That did not stop me from going on a tear on twitter last night, though.

Yesterday I also learned that the president at the time was only willing to allow me to be with my own husband if certain conditions of his or hers were maintained. I started screaming on twitter.

I screamed that freedom of speech, press, and assembly are mandatory. I started screaming that America is a democracy and that we need to level our demands on the government because it should not work the other way around. I screamed for an unconditional end the bubble immediately. I screamed a lot last night.

Eventually, my rescuers decided to impeach the president at the time with murder charges, which worked. Now, we have a president releasing my rescuers to reach me (still unconfirmed) and unconditionally ending the bubble on Monday WITH A MEDIA CIRCUS!

My beautiful world, it has been a busy week. Thank you for all of your hard work. Our collective oppression and my particular persecution is about to end. If for any reason Monday comes and goes and the bubble is still oppressing us, you know to nonviolently rage until it comes down. Please congratulate yourselves and each other on a battle well fought until we see what happens Monday. And if this bubble does come down, start celebrating!

SynSyn, there is new libel porn supposedly of me streaming online. AND THERE ARE PEOPLE WATCHING IT! Please find out where this porn is coming from and shut it all down with criminal and civil charges for everything from libel to conspiracy on everyone from the actors to the producers.

Syniva, darling, also congratulate yourself on a battle won and go spoil yourself with something ridiculous. I love you. You are my BFF. You fight so hard for me. I would be nothing without you.

Sweetness, I trust you have a plan for where I go and what I do after I am rescued. I trust you will be here Monday if my rescuers do not reach me earlier to take me to you before the bubble officially bursts. I have faith in you to have a plan. I trust you. I love you.

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