... Besides, I am such an obstinate person when I make a decision; if I had ever chosen to be dead, I would be by now.
Please note: I can get this blogpost into the public eye. However, they will not allow me to look at my own blog nor any comments after I do so. As per usual, this is still a mostly outgoing truth flow. It is so hard to get any information to me at all. This is all still based on what harms I am still being forced to live through.
Even while twitching on the floor of the hallway of this, my dedicated torture facility in the UK, where they left me after physically dragging me back in from the lobby and while I was having a PTSD breakdown shortly thereafter while a member of the nursing staff stood over me yelling at me, I still came back from converting into energy form. My door to Nirvana was shut because people (most likely subconsciously,... but possibly otherwise) reached out to keep me here. That night was that of approximately May 21st or 22nd, 2010. They locked me in here in this torture facility in plain sight on false (better known as QUACKED) medical pretenses on May 19th, 2010.
My visiting hours: 2 - 4 PM and 6 - 8 PM, daily
The address of this (Please pardon my signature understatement on this next phrase.) torture facility:
The Windsor House In-Patient Mental Health Facility
40 Upper Parliament Street
A few of my fellow inmates believe the only reason no help has yet arrived to remove me from this facility and forcibly take me away from the harms of this terrorist, fascist government is because my friends don't know how to find the building. They don't even know completely who I really am in this world, but they know I am an only good person that is tortured here. My actual inmates do not understand why no one has come to help me yet. It is so hard for me to explain to them. So little truth reaches us in here.
Please do not send any gifts or packages to this address. The nursing staff steals all things, including the flowers you send me, and refuses to acknowledge to my face that any of your gifts have ever existed in the first place. I do receive the occassional card from my mom, Mrs. Dinadar Albon Varilek, though. Funny, the nursing staff also refuses to acknowledge that I have ever existed in their presence as a human due my human rights or even any human respect at all. Please use all of those resources you once thought might come to me to fix this real problem instead. We need to break this government from being able to enforce human suffering on myself and its population any longer.
We need to end the human suffering first... There is more here than just my own. Please talk things out to prevent it from ever happening again AFTER you break them from constantly torturing me here.
Most distressingly, the British Secret Service (domestic) still insists completely that this is a medical facility that is keeping me confined instead of the truth that I am this government's completely innocent torture victim and political prisoner. It is such an insult to me that they refuse to even lie to me convincingly and logically-soundly at all. We know that this is my dedicated torture facility from them. We know they are oppressing every person near me to the full extent they can execute just to be able to continue denying me all human rights. We know that as long as they insist on pretending that this could ever be an even slightly convincing facade of a medical process, they are still bound by medical laws, as well... not just international treatises and conclusions such as the Geneva Conventions.
The nursing staff enjoys (Please, pardon that understatement.) holding me down and injecting me with a chemical cocktail of what contents they refuse to tell me. The night time nursing staff includes my rapists. There are many other forms of torture here for me and my inmates as well.
We know I have only been consulted by one psychiatrist on one occasssion here. It was a "Dr. Mian" on June 9th, 2010. (My beloved husband's 47th birthday.) Her conclusion was to stop torturing me and send me back to San Francisco as soon as possible. Ever since and even completely before, all other actual medical professionals have been kept completely away from being able to come ANYwhere near me with ANY form of ANY treatment at all.
Thusly, there is no way for them to pretend they have had any way to diagnose me of anything while constantly denying me any and all ACTUAL medical care while physically keeping and deeply harming me here. Best, after more than two independent medical professionals including at least one lady psychaitrist deemed me incompetent to make my own medical decisions in order to confine and detain me under Section 2 of the Mental Health Act of 1983, they have detained me here with the only intent of physically and mentally harming me as much as possible. Even more powerfully, their outright refusal to give me ANY medical care (Has anybody heard my cough lately?) deems them completely incapable of EVER having created any prescription for me. Most amazingly, they have no grounds for detaining me here for treatment (also known as, Section 3 of the Mental Health Act of 1983) for UP TO six months due to refusing to allow any medical professionals to assess me other that the ONE who said I should go home to San Francisco as soon as possible.
They like to pretend that my knowing more than they do is a symptom of something other than their own culpability. Who treats ANY human this way?... and pretends they are innocent of any responsibilty for the war crimes they carried out themselves afterwards?
The injections are only one (1) of the many (##) forms of torture used on me in this facility. They cause five major effects on my person:
1.) They take away my ability to think clearly at all about anything.
2.) Even if I could form an idea, the injections take away any and all abilities I normally have to articulate that idea into any form of human expression.
3.) They cause involuntary muscle reactions that contort my body into inhumane shapes.
4.) They reduce my metablolism to such a low degree that my appetite almost disappears, that my muscle mass atrofies, and that my ankles swell from the low level of circulation.
5.) The injections also prevent my complete connection with the energies that flow naturally through this world.
Again, their insistence on holding me down and sticking needles in my backside while I am doing nothing but being my own peaceful, educational, non-violent, humanity-conscious, genius self is a sure sign they just get a high off of harming me. Oh, it has come very close to ending who I really am in this world a few times now. Surrounding me with the worthlessness that stands for the very bottom of what humanity is capable of (also known as the nursing staff here) while abandoning me without any hope for help to leave this facility nor country due to the high level of corruptness in this terrorist, fascist regime of a farce of a government has actually almost made me give up on humanity (including myself) being worth helping any more. They have come close with that one a few times.
Just because their tortures have NOT yet caused me any PERMANENT harm, it does not make it okay to continue torturing me here. It hurts like hell to heal from these things, and they make it a point of denying me enough food to normally eat everyday anyway... whenever the government is able to bludgeoningly enforce that one. My inmates, the other ACTUAL medical patients being denied ALL medical care here, are such heroes to me in here. We are doing everything we can to take care of each other. The "nursing" staff is always in the way of any of our healing.