Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Bushmen of the Kalahari

Let us begin by taking a good honest look at the military. The members of the armed forces today are commonly good, hardworking people with no college education yet who often could not find employment anywhere else. Our warrior class are meagerly-paid pawns who fight, die, and incur permanent injuries, so the elite of this nation can vie for world domination, gain control of foreign countries' oil, and make money off their fighting and dying bodies. The oligarchy's riches are built in more ways than popularly known on the backs of the poor.

And Obama the Fascist is escalating conflict with Iran. He wants WW3, and he plans to start it before his term is up. What is his excuse to the public? Iran has a nuclear program (yet no weapons). How many nuclear weapons does Obama the Warmongerer have under his control? If President Hypocrisy has his way, we will have another war over oil, money, and power justified with racism and propaganda and paid for with the souls of our troops in less than a year. Do not let him get away with it.

Do you know the true role of the military? It is not to create conflict in the world, so the rich can become richer. Their job is to protect America and American's human, civil, and Constitutional rights and freedoms at all costs. They did not join the military to destroy our world's remaining peace and stability.

A great way to find out who is pulling Obama the Puppet's strings is to look at his campaign contributors. They are guilty, too, of conspiring to ruin this nation and destroy peace and stability in the world. All donations over fifty dollars to his supporting super PACs must be reported. Check the paperwork. I bet you will find corporate greed.

How many unconstitutional bills have passed Obama the Dictator's desk with a flourish of his pen? If we do not fight him and his agenda, if we do not fight to save this nation, if we do not fight to revive the US Constitution in its completeness, this nation will degrade into nothing but anarchy and mayhem.

There is nothing illegal nor unpatriotic in organized and peaceful civil disobedience... just try not to trespass. The greater your numbers when you act to save this nation, the safer you will be. Stand up. Organize. Unite. Save America.

Do you remember when the guilty parties claimed the spy equipment in my head was really a part of some sick scientific experiment? That lie was clearly spread by people who have no idea how a proper and legal scientific experiment is actually conducted. It was clearly not the Johns Hopkins University; they can actually tell you the entire scientific process.

I used to attend Johns Hopkins, you know. That was where I worked towards my Ph.D. in Mathematics. It was weird. They were mistaken in thinking I was Jewish instead of an atheist. Then again, my good friend from Pikesville whom I met when we were both studying at Cambridge one summer had convinced me to fast with her for Rosh Hashana. I did not think anything weird about it. After all, I like good klezmer just as much as the next atheist. So, I understand my professors' confusion.

On a completely unrelated note, people think I can talk to animals. Let me allow you in on a little secret. To talk to cats, you need to make meowing noises just like the cats do. It is much easier to call a cat. To do that, simply make clicking noises like those found in the language of the Bushmen of the Kalahari. Cats love that stuff. It makes me wonder if the Bushmen are capable of talking to lions.

Now, my beautiful world, if you hear stories about me, you need to double check your sources. If you hear lies, call out the source of the lies and report them to the authorities. We need to get them arrested for slander and libel. That is how we make sure you all are never lied to again. Slander about me is very easy to pick out; it is everything bad said about me. No, I am not a dead, pregnant, single exotic dancer and male prostitute. There will always be lies. Make sure you arrest the slanderers and libelers. Spreading lies about me is very dangerous for the entire world.

Sweetness, I was serious about becoming a "puddle of love and brains" when you speak to me. Just wait. I am always right about these things. Oh, and did I hear you put me in the union(s)? Damn, do I ever love you. Now I can finally rationalize all of my union solidarity. Until you kiss my lipsticked face...!

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