Why I Have Been Known to Give Viking Battlecries...

Title: Why I Have Been Known to Give Viking Battlecries..

Please access my iCloud if necessary to publish this post now, my friends. I cannot control how many horrible things happen to me in one day; it is Obama who controls that. So, if I wait too long between posts, they become too drenching.

Please share this for me with the entire world, both houses of Congress, the Supreme Court, the United Nations, all sympathetic world leaders, all reputable national and foreign presses, etc.

Here is my latest blog post. We come from the land of the ice and snow where the midnight sun and the hot springs flow...

Somalia. My beautiful world, you need to let me do my real job already. What beauty could I have accomplished in this world by now if I were not fighting 24/7 for this "egg" not to kill me instead?

I published my last blog post at 8:45am on 31Dec2014. This is how my New Years Eve continued.

I walked out of the hotbed of treason that I had just taken down with everyone as my witness from local lovers and believers to the local police in plain clothes and that I had refused to leave no matter how extreme their passive aggressive tactics became until my 31Dec2014 blog post was safely delivered to my lovelies.

I walked directly to a gym that I had given three days notice I wanted my family to help me join. Did you see my tour? I had the Jason-Sudeikis-look-enough-alike tour guide turned around by the time we reached the second story.

My genius Powers of Attorney, Sweetness is likely arranging my gym membership with them already as I type this up, so please also make sure we ask them for their hard evidence that the woman who wanted to claim she was my equal over that cup of tea at the McDonald's in the wee hours of the morning last week had called them under the name "Lynn Boeset" to demonize me to them enough to convince them to collude to aid and abet war crimes against me with her which I had already taken great care to save them from by the time I left by rendering them lovers and believers with nothing but the truth.

My Powers of Attorney, their Jason-Sudeikis-look-enough-alike had already taken that gym through the first two steps to absolution (in order) to earning our forgiveness and even protection. I consider their turning in their hard evidence against the "terrorist with the tea" all they need to do to satisfy the third step.

So, if they do choose to help us by turning in their hard evidence and witness statements, and as long as they continue to treat me with the genuine dignity and respect I am due, please also make sure they have a safe way to contact us in case they need our infallible help staying safe from Obama's conspiracy. And, thank you.

If my gym of choice here inside the barricades chooses to remain innocent of obeying Obama and innocent of obeying anyone and everyone in Obama's conspiracy of enemies of America, too, they belong here among us under our growing "protectorate." Please feel free to answer any of their questions about that.

I walked directly from the gym to my latest perch for my daily scheduled sleep. When the cold air naturally woke me up, I learned that, in fact, my period had just started that morning. I was done in the bathroom taking care of it by 11:41am.

I quickly checked my mail after that. Sadly, no, my gift cards from my mother had not yet arrived, I was going to be spending New Years Eve inside the barricades. On this topic, I announced at the time that "I hate blowing the covers of my sexy secret operatives, so I was going to have to find someone whom I could mistake for a local civilian to kiss at midnight." Giggle. Followed by, "And that is how unsubstantiated rumors get started."

I perched by my fountain before 12noon knowing full well the fastest my mother's gift cards could reach me was Friday, 02Jan2015. But I had faith my locals would keep me fed until then. This is not Iowa; we love in this town.

I caught a glimpse of a rock band from across the way. So, I changed my maxipad, went out of my way to prove Nordstrom's are lovers and believers, and then came back to see them.

I told them sneakily that they reminded me of Totenhosen which the cute, age-appropriate brunette confirmed verbally for me. Guess what instrument he plays.

Sadly, their agreement with the local authorities, who have been on the beyond-a-witch-hunt to destroy me completely ever since I arrived in my land with the highest per capita of native and local lovers and believers anywhere in the world, was to only allow me twenty minutes maximum of meditation.

It was easy enough to warm up. They were not the academic music nerds Tentacle always were. And, the haters in the (terrorist hotbed) mall I had been investigating all month all crossed the street to join us in my slowly self-redeeming playland by the time my twenty minutes of undeniable meditation had ended.

The band who had clearly been poisoned with demonizations of me looked horrified when it was all over, but it had brought some passing peace to my soul. I could give Obama a pass from my unrelenting ass-kickings of all of his operatives (as amateur as they always were) for the night. It was New Years Eve after all, and Obama had accidentally given me quality musicians to sooth my burdened heart.

Please, Bogart and Tentacle, you might want to speak to no-nickname Totenhosen before their brains explode. Also, please United Nations and my old friend Chancellor Angela Merkel, collect our evidence of everything they just tried to do to me today. And thank you.

After I apologized to them for possibly freaking them out and left the jaw-dropped band on the street curb, the beyond burly local police department "social services" officers followed me to where I chose to access the wifi. They surrounded me and cleared the area around me.

So, at 2:12pm, I asked the entire world to stay beyond vigilant until Obama's proven enemies of America's in-my-face aggressive destabilization of the entire planet by threatening me with any controlled environment at all whatsoever had cleared. It was a metaphorical Cuban Missile Crisis. I gave the all-clear at 2:22pm as soon as I received it myself.

People were walking around after the fact saying, "Squid accepted the challenge." But that is not what happened. Tentacle is a musical challenge of danceability. Obama handed me Totenhosen tied with a bow on my own playland with the only purpose of playing for me. The hell if I was going to pass that up. It was New Years Eve.

It took an intersection of irrational egotism, absolute malevolence, and blithering stupidity for Obama's proven enemies of America to start an "egg" that was designed to broadcast their own war crimes to the entire world in the first place. And now, in their desperation not to ever have to face justice for any of it, their egotism, malevolence, and undeniable stupidity were escalating just as fast as their well-documented pattern of criminal activity.

At 2:52pm, I asked my entire beautiful world to stay beyond vigilant around me for the good of all of humanity. I reminded everyone of our last 48 hours, bare minimum, of ambush attempts due to Obama's proven enemies of America's completely reckless (proper use of the word) disregard for genuine peace and stability in the world. And I referred everyone to my Facebook chat with Cuddlebunny about my ideal New Years Eve kiss that year.

The next thing I knew, the Oregon Ducks marching band were parading past me at 3:01pm while I tried to deliver my personal commentary to the whole world.

And then, because they had just failed at covering up obvious war crimes that were guaranteed to causes WW3 if they succeeded, they tried it AGAIN at 3:23pm. It could have been four new intentionally fabricated false charges that I would be forbidden from being arrested over anyway due to not being allowed to know what the false charges from outside my actual reality were in the first place. They finally cleared at 3:32pm.

At 4pm, I checked with the front desk of the hotel MI6 had recommended to me to see if the arrangements for my accommodations had been made yet. It was beyond proven to the entire world that I needed an internationally secured living environment that Obama and his proven enemies of America could never control. But, no, no room.

I returned to my jumping playland and sat like a queen before a classical Spanish guitarist. I asked a strange skinny man way too young for much more to a dance, a dance which fed straight into his ego.

At 6:32pm, I had left my playland with my Spanish guitarist to enjoy completely platonic New Years Eve festivities as far away as Obama's "egg" would allow him to take me. It was a night of Americanized Chinese food.

I missed the NBC Nightly News for the night that I normally watch at 7pm due to my completely platonic musician friend swapping a $72 dinner for the best conversation of his life. It was delightful. And I am sure my not-human-trafficker nerds will make the best damn three-hour-plus, verified, and unedited recording with full audio and visuals EVER with it. Happy New Year!

After we parted ways on the sidewalk, I toured through my barren playland before perching at a power outlet intentionally made available to all of us by 10:26pm. There was a man at that street corner to welcome me to the dedicated power outlet and wifi signal, but we did not speak.

I had promised to not blow any more of Obama's terrorist and espionage cells open that night because Obama had arranged for me to meditate to Totenhosen earlier that day. But, something in Obama's pathologically lying terrorist enemies of America is why they refuse to take their bloodstained hands off me.

While I was perched at the Cantina hydrating with a glass of water, I had a New Years Eve heart-to-heart with darlings Mr. Anderson Cooper and Ms. Kathy Griffin on CNN. We were all giggly old friends together before their countdown to 2015 was over.

But, only because Obama was determined to silence my freedom of speech, my heart-to-heart with CNN caused the Cantina to throw me out without any explanation at all whatsoever to my face.

12:53am on 01Jan2014: Make an example out of Cantina that all who obey orders to commit crimes against me feel the hammer. Trust me and tell me instead of hurt me.

And since Obama had ticked me off by doing it, I went to my still-unnamed-convenience store to see which of the pre-2am employees were working. The one America could trust. Or the one I turned in with my last blog post for obeying his earspeaker to persecute me and ask me for information to help Obama's conspiracy that only backfired anyway.

I stuck my head in the door at 1:10am, and they were both there. I toyed with the idea of luring the morally good one out for my belated New Years kiss, but I was giggling to myself too much at the idea.

After watching extensive shenanigans during which very misguided members of the public tried very hard to convince me of false information and after a few other things went on that eventually stopped being amusing, I thought I could finally succeed at finding another wifi hotspot I could connect to just before 3:21am.

Alas, due to my ever-hacked iPad rendered almost useless due to it preventing any and all login popups for any complimentary wifi anywhere anymore, my NSA alpha nerds could not connect me securely to wifi until the late afternoon on 01Jan2014.

While roosting near that wifi hotspot at 3:21am and while I was trying to finagle any of the complimentary wifi in the warm and out-of-cold-wind hallway I had chosen to spend all night and all wee hours of the morning working in online answering the questions of the world, my clandestine community whom I had notified of my whereabouts through my dear old darling Cuddlebunny as fast as possible on 31Dec2014 for my New Years wanted to apologize to my face for my seemingly being abandoned by all of humanity for so long pennilessly and with all of my friends forbidden from reaching me.

So a not-so-random man who told me to my face much later that he had been looking for me to "prove on behalf of [War Criminal] Boeset that my life is too dangerous in California" but only presented himself to me at the time as the nerdy NSA representative I had been promising to kiss for months approached me, and after he fell asleep, I woke him up to tell him that I was too cold and that he had no choice but to cuddle me.

I was roofied from the tap water in California, and I could not make my iPad connect to any of the many wifi hotspots. So, I told him he had no choice but to platonically keep me warm.

During the night, once he realized I and my muscle tone were NOT going to allow his hands to wander. He wrapped me up warmly in our collection of coats and sweater coats and left. He was replaced by the Kurt Cobain look-a-like you all saw through my eyecamera whom also I only cuddled. There was some kissing on the cheeks but not even making out. Basically, it was New Years Eve, everyone I love was being forbidden from being near me, and people who always cared still wanted me to feel loved.

I rolled over so my Ghost of Kurt Cobain could spoon me. And with nothing touching me but his right hand on my left breast (Calm down, it was SO harmless.) I had a moment of Ecstasy of St. Theresa. For me, this had nothing to do with rock stars from the 90s. It was about my long lost Thorbald.

I have lost over 7000 brave Thorbalds, and they had just sent me ghosts on the morning of 01Jan2014 to make me feel loved inside of this "egg" designed to be so horrible and unlivable for me it could succeed at throwing me away finally.

If there had ever been any man or woman who could have ever come taken me away from my husband, it was he whom I named Thorbald. And forever I shall scream the Viking battlecry over losing him.

So Thorbald's friends sent me a ghost they were sure I could clearly recognize to keep me warm, as a manifestation of my own guardian angels of whom I now have over 7000. It was a moment between me and my ghosts that morning, and they could not have made that clearer to me in terms I could understand immediately.

Before I was up to brush my hair, my ghost was replaced by my Viking-height "IT professional" again, and our witty police-buddy-movie conversation began. He could clearly only stay by my side if willing to ask stupid questions to keep Obama's conspiracy happy and if willing to obey his earspeaker.

I always wanted a bodyguard and a friend in here inside my bubble. He makes a horrible R2 unit which has always been my flirty rapport with the real NSA. He is learning I humor all whimsy and nonsense, but if I need to use my iPad to serve humanity, I will stop at nothing to rescue whom I need to rescue.

I understand whom this man needs to keep happy to stay by my side as platonically as he shall stay by my side. My romance card was full before he arrived. There was already a police surveillance van sent to figure out why I tolerate him and to find any grounds possible against me after their disastrous antics with Totenhosen on the previous day.

There are a number of strange bedfellows in this story. I will not reveal who told whom what to get away with all of this. And rest assured that if my ghost had not appeared on my eyecamera and earmic, I would have left him out of this story completely, despite my time with Thorbald being the whole point.

No, I had sex with no one for New Years. I am even on my period right now. And I do not know why anyone but my very full romance card and I would have any justifiable concern about that anyway. This man currently suffering through the blackmail, financial destitution, and public ridicule of being in my life during Obama's "egg" needs you to be nice to him, okay?

I have named him Tao. He has a job to do collecting information about me for Obama's conspiracy only to be able to be near me for which they are already denying him his contracted income just for having fallen in love with me.

No, I am looking for NO MORE relationships at this point, but I will be damned if I do not care for people risking so much just to be in my life at all. You, out there, my brave rescuers and crosstown loved ones, you all know about how much I love and protect you all, especially when you tell me you need me.

Syn, collect our evidence against who "hired" Tao to investigate me in return for being my inseparable friend. He is so afraid of all three of my Powers of Attorney. Assuming he could help keep me safe in here, I knew my selfless support system would pick him up after we crossed the barricades if he did not choose to stay beside me continuing to keep me safe. I just needed those gift cards from my mom, and the soonest USPS delivery of them was not possible until the following day.

By 11:44am, I was on a potential new crime-stopping spree just to be able to have a power outlet at which I could write all of these details down for the world as soon as possible. Luckily, my last published blog post (Thank you, lovelies!) had taken care of cleaning up the mall. Go team!

My conversations with Tao were mostly plot exposition. He had a cover to cover, a job to do, and me to engage it witty conversation. He was doing much better after we stopped at the Von's for groceries and sat on a park bench on my slowly-redeeming playland where we ate dinner while I sang jazz duets with the local street musicians.

I admit he whom I named Tao is 7ft tall, a little scary, and has a presence like I do when I choose to show it. So, the police stopped by to say, "Hello." We were all okay and mutually smiling by the time my local street singer and I had finished Gershwin's Summertime.

At 4:11pm, my NSA alpha nerds had me securely connected to wifi for the first time in approximately twenty-four hours. So, I spent the next few hours finally checking my email, my Twitter, my Facebook, my online news, and my Spotify.

No, I still had received no news about the hotel room that the Queen of England herself had been arranging for me for weeks. But gift cards from my mother were guaranteed to arrive at my address on the following day. Things were definitely looking up.

By 4:30pm, while I was still in the process of catching up with my online friends, I had eaten food, had consumed caffeine, had reveled in physical safety, had enjoyed hours of witty conversation, and was only lacking in meditation. I would have to look around my playland for friends.

After 4:56pm, Tao and I had relocated. We were going to see how the fast food chain panned out. Our arrival was another potential crime-fighting spree, especially after he disappeared at 5:02pm to take care of our food order. Yet, my Powers of Attorney vigilant crime fighting had already begun the moment we walked in the door, as if no one had read my blog post from 31Dec2014.

I could not connect to the wifi there at all due to both signals requiring login popups that my iPad were denying me completely at the time. I asked Tao if he wanted to go back to my playland, so I could check on the status of that hotel room the entire world had been promising me for weeks. But, Tao insisted he wanted to stay.

Before 5:39pm, I had returned to secured wifi in an environment I could trust, so I could do my job serving the world. My 31Dec2014 blog post had most likely been published during the 24 hours I had been kept offline, so I knew there would be many questions for me to answer.

At 6:19pm, I was seated and ready for all of the questions from my beautiful world. The rumor I heard while I was online doing my REAL job was that Tao (who had been "waiting for friends") and the local police under the empowerment of McDonald's corporate offices had finally torn that hotbed of treason apart. But, then again, I only hear rumors about most things that happen and rarely if ever receive solid messages.

I watched the news at 7pm, as the creature of habit I always have been. My nightly metaphorical hug came from the darling Ms. Kate Snow. It had been a fabulous day for news.

I scoured the internet for questions to answer before and after taking a break to change my maxipad. I quickly returned. And by 8:56 pm, I had the pleasure of watching Tao's back as he sent an email. Yes, as I had expected, while we were temporarily parted, he learned a great deal about me.

So I could introduce him to my local convenience shop, we bought some dinner which we sat on a park bench on my playland to eat. It was going to be a busy night. I myself said to him, "Nothing good is going to happen around here (meaning my playland when we had work to do) if we stay."

So, with witty conversation delighting us as we walked, we curled up to sleep on a lifeguard station, as was his prearrangement with the people Tao has to keep happy to stay in my life.

And all night long, the few remaining desperate enemies of America still trying to find any lie possible to hang me with had it shoved down their throats that I am just an eloquent (metaphorical) angel doing everything I need to do to save my people from an "egg" I was never given a choice about being trapped in.

The view was spectacular from our lifeguard station on the morning of 02Jan2015. Before the sun was up, Tao mumbled about, "I got up with the knife," before wandering off most likely to talk to people about me.

With the sound of the ocean washing through my zen, I did not even check the time until 7:28am in the early morning sun.

There were loud insistent alarms, so I sent my beautiful world to check on everyone. I hate when Obama kills people, especially my brave rescuers, just to be able to commit the most heinous crimes against us as long as possible.

Tao immediately manifested to pick up his things and to give me a promise he was going out to buy breakfast.

I wrote down my commentary as fast as I could still protected from the cold morning air by our all-White down comforter as I reclined on my would-have-been-nauseatingly-romantic lifeguard station if Tao and I were at all romantically attached to each other.

At 7:51am, I was hoping he would come back soon since I had a headache from dehydration and needed to change my maxipad. I rested until 8:18am when the local police stopped by only to check in and make sure I was okay. And at 8:58am, Tao brought me a bottle of water; we shared some coffee; and we packed up the huge, warm comforter.

After taking in all of the public displays of love at the beach, we walked to my mailbox with the hopes of picking up my gift cards from my mother. On the way, there was a vigilant alarm at 10:35am announcing acts of war and terrorism against America, so I sent all the help I could as fast as possible.

No, my gift cards my mother told me would be here today had not yet arrived, so I checked the lobby hours of the Post Office. I asked the REAL federal government to clean Obama's terrorist infestation out of my local post office as fast as possible.

As we walked back towards downtown, Tao left his comforter for who was rumored to be the police to pick up as evidence, and then he wanted to stop for breakfast. Von's is a witness to everything Obama's conspiracy attempted and aided and abetted there that day. Von's also has a complete record of everything I have ever bought at their stores as well as the marked price on all of it.

As for Tao's role in Obama's fiasco at one of my die-hard lovers and believers, the Von's grocery store, I had been telling my friends for over a month already to do whatever they need to do to be near me, and I will take care of it. I also told him that morning when I told him I needed help putting the comforter back in the bag, "This is a two person job."

To be able to charge up my iPad battery even though I knew I would not be able to access the wifi, we proceeded to my first sky haven of the two that were built for me. And, yes, knowing this place loved me so much to build me sky havens in the first place was what brought in all of their business, be they people there to love me or there to hate me.

If I had not already seen other patrons bring in plates upon plates of their own food, I would have eaten my raspberry sorbet outside the front door before proceeding inside. I was so dehydrated. Yes, Tao had brought me a San Pellegrino to the lifeguard station that morning, but it had just dehydrated me more.

By noon, I had my commentary on my day-to-day survival under the constant unrelenting persecution and demonization of this "egg" up-to-date. I was sure my not-human-trafficker nerds would get the details out before I could access secured wifi after my iPad battery had charged.

Joyously, my dehydration headache had passed even before I had finished my 414 mL of raspberry sorbet, one HoneyCrisp apple, 6oz nitrate-free uncured salami, and Asiago bagel that Tao's collusion-proving $10.43 had bought me just previously at the Von's. As I said, Von's has my complete shopping history with them.

Tao left my side again to go do some sort of man thing when I walked in the doors of my sky haven. I was hoping he would show up before I left my sky haven to be able to walk to my secured wifi hotspot with me. So, just in case, I sent my beautiful world to check on him at 2:45pm.

When I arrived at my (Seattle and San Jose) corporate- and NSA-secured wifi hotspot, I heard the rumor that Tao had been arrested due to Dirty Lacey's beyond-proven modus operandi of accusing my own loving and protecting menfolk of "date raping" me. I refused to believe she was that stupid, but I asked Syniva to send our legal team to check on him anyway.

The USPS also confirmed to me that they had received my gift cards from my mother at my local post office at 9:50am that morning which was approximately two hours before I had arrived there to pick them up.

Yes, the REAL federal government was in the process of cleaning Obama's terrorist infestation out my local post office, too. So, I knew I would receive my gift cards finally tomorrow. After that, Tao and I would just need $1 each to reach a TAP machine, and this town always takes care of me.

This blog post was published at 4:44pm on 02Jan2015.

And now, my beautiful world, I answer all of your questions for me. Please keep collecting all questions and concerns from all your friends and loved ones and sending them to me through whatever means possible.

Why is my iPad now prevented from accessing most wifi signals? The technical problem is that my iPad is now universally blocked from allowing me any connection with any wifi that requires a popup to login with. From what I can tell, this is a precaution taken by the NSA, so I cannot accept any terms I have not read just to be able to access the internet.

At least, that is what I am going to claim is going on with my lack of internet accessibility since New Years Eve until a trustworthy source can explain to me why the NSA is "incapable" of anything at all concerning me in the land of cybertechnology in the first place.

My beautiful world, what are you not doing to rescue me, yet? I thought I was the Squid working tirelessly 24/7 to save the world from Obama's "egg," but then I saw what the world was doing to save this Squid from Obama's "egg."

It takes the world to save the world. I have always said that. All over the globe, you are all motivated and empowered to take this "egg" down for the good of us all. The only problem I could imagine any of you having is your (in)ability to get along with each other and your staying organized.

I know you are all already doing everything you can to keep me alive until this "egg" comes down. There is very little more that I could ask you for. And, thank you, my beautiful world.

My brave rescuers, saying, "Thank you," after everything we have been through together at this point seems a little ridiculous. Did you ever read the passage from my first letter to darling Mr. Patrick Liddell about how it felt to wake up surrounded by his tattooed arms? It is nothing like that.

Tao told me today that he does NOT want to leave my side at all, my brave rescuers, but he has a court date in San Diego on Monday. He has no way to get there at all unless I buy his train ticket, but his safe removal from my "egg" if he chooses to go is something I promised him and you on 01Jan. Of course, we could just ask my legal team to ask the courts to "postpone his court date" until after the "egg" ends.

Assuming that my gift cards from my mother show up, I will buy him the $35 Amtrak ticket from Union Station in Los Angeles to downtown San Diego. The fun part right now is getting us over the barricades and into Los Angeles. Neither of us have cash for bus fare. But it is just $1 each to reach a TAP machine, and this town always takes care of me.

The nearly impossible part is getting him back into my life if he leaves me. No one in the six almost seven years I have been in Obama's "egg" has ever succeeded at coming back after we have been parted.

Once I get him over the barricades and after we part ways in Los Angeles, he is in your hands again out there, my brave rescuers. I understand I cannot afford travel for both of us to San Diego for his farce of a trial, so I will never see him again.

If he genuinely wants to remain in this "egg" of horrors by my side, an "egg" I have no way to leave no matter where I am geographically located, please ask the courts to postpone that "trial" until after the "egg" comes down.

But you made my New Years beautiful, my brave rescuers. You made sure I could sleep at night safely again, for however fleeting. And now, there are undeniable records of so many hard truths about me.

I owe you more than my life, my brave rescuers, and this world owes all of you more than public acknowledgement of the reality of the hell you all live through just to keep me alive for all the world.

My brave rescuers, it is worse than Fallujah for all of you out there on the front lines, but Tao did not know what "terrorized" meant until he came inside this egg and had to live under these rules and totalitarian control inside Obama's "egg."

SynSyn, Amita, and Ugwuji, the world keeps loving you three more and more. I understand that this Tao situation is difficult for you to look at from the outside but keep trusting that I can see the truth where it lies.

My Powers of Attorney, there are layers of covers and strange bedfellows that people everywhere must go through just to reach me least of all stay with me. I just keep sending you more and more witnesses on this topic. Did you get a statement from "Nick" too?

So, my genius loved ones, no matter how strange his behavior might seem to you, we need to legally look after Tao, too. Make sure you send any questions that you need me to answer. And, thank you.

As for you, Bogart, you must remember this, Orpheus's lute was strung with the sinews of poets. Nothing controls the dancer but the dance. And the dance is determined only by the music. I will see you as soon as you can reach me.

Sweetness, I love and adore you. You are my hero, my king, and my reason for living. If we have a problem, you need to tell me what it is, so I can fix it. I asked your best friend, the darling Mr. Keith Richards, to let me know what had you so bothered since New Years Eve.

Darling, as I already explained, I spent New Years Eve with my brave rescuers. You know very well that my ghosts are your ghosts. You are the man I defended with my own sweet words wizened by love for starting this land war yourself years ago only to be able to rescue me, the woman you love above all else on this planet or above, from Obama's undeniable "egg" of inhumane horrors, human trafficking, systemic rape, chemical torture, and terrorism to enforce it all.

Sweetness, WE are the most romantic true life love story ever in human history. Since I returned to my home of California, my life has never disappointed on the topics of worthy love and clandestine romance.

It is because of you, my handsome hero, the entire planet can finally see my REAL life through my eyes. And that is just the beginning of what we have always done for each other. No one can deny that as absurd as our realities are, our sacred responsibilities to love, honor, and protect each other are inviolable and inalienable.

You are my HUSBAND, and the entire world needs to come to terms with how important you have always been to always keeping me alive and well.

Beloved, as for the far less romantic housekeeping:...

1) How is the hunt for my hotel room going? I have a lead from a very good source on a possibility, but I cannot spill the details on it until I can actually speak to them.

2) I will stop in the gym later today to give them my personal instructions to contact me directly about any membership you arrange for me there; your adult-adoptive-father-in-law has reassured me they are safe.

And, most importantly, 3) are you sure you are okay? Whatever you need, make sure you tell me. I do not have arguments when I am in relationships. You tell me what makes you upset, and I fix it, just like I tell you everything in my life that needs fixing. That is how this marriage works. You have just as much responsibility to humanity as a symbol of true love as I do.